uh....
good morning
my name is dennis ego-swyne
i now manage mr......
(whats that bastards name....suze..?)
oh yes
stephen kilby
i'll be writing this blog this morning
seems kilby has been on here trying to be funny
well thats all over now
we will be using this blogsite
to tell you what what products this man
has available
and more importantly
how you can buy em....!
now i note this blog is free
hmmm
we ll have to change all that
now....
i guess if you all send your credit carde details
i'll start processing your orders
i believe this fellow
has some great music out there
with some good catchy bits
and hummable lyrics
theres a new one with an....italian title
or something
oh suze says its spanish
and its got all their greatest hits
and we'd like to sell a few million
cos my wifes little merc is acting up
and i'd like to get her a lexus next year
also kilby and band
all need extensive makeovers
so they can appeal more to the kids in america
(wo -o)
so
have your credit card handy
and we ll send you
a free mr mister cd with every purchase
if youre in the uk
pay in pounds
if youre in new zealand
dont bother
this offer only goode
in mega prosperous countries
well thatss it
kilby himself wont be back till next year
he told me
to tell you
the triplets all say happy new whatever
and
that a great new inter active video
will be available in 06
KING BONG
produced by pam and perry m fizzeema
story of a runaway rocker
who swipes at "straights"
whilst climbing corporat ladder
finally revealed as hippy with heart
recommended for the whole family
(just make those little buggers
close their eyes during the violent and sexy stuff)
ok
things are gonna shape up round here in 06
kilby got me in to make him a mega star idol
and quite frankly
its gonna be a long haul
(i think hes washed up myself)
but we signed him
and now we gonna market his ass off
dont just sit there
BUY SOMETHING!!
only a few hours left till next year
so order now
our experienced staff
are waiting to talk to you right now
see you in 0 six
BAYBEE
Saturday, December 31, 2005
Friday, December 30, 2005
should older quaint aunts be forgot....?
there you are
i always know where to find you
i been thinking about ya a lot
lately
thinking how nice
and kind
and sweet
you can be
that youre there when
i need a soldier to cry on
the way you help me
feel its ok to be me
and the year has nearly gone baby
were you goode this yeare...?
me....?
i was goode and badde..
just shifting ratios
the 3 gunas combining recombining
the past present future exerting its triple pull
us spinning round the sun
the sun spinning round its sun
and that sun spinning too
in wider arcs
time impenetratable
space ever receding in the distance
love, only an ideal
truth pliant , relative
hope for hope
life by life
on and on
the richest guy in australia just died
his investments alone earned him
a million fuckin bux a day
he woke up each morning
and he was 500 grande richer
than when he went to bed
he could have a five minute nap and buy a fender strat
each second he got more than you in a day
now what.....
what good did it all do...?
i dunno
it must be harder to say goodbye when you got so much
harder to let go
life entangles ya
it gives ya reasons to take it seriously
it can turn ya "straight"
my kids threw their half eaten ice cream cones down at the beach
a big alpha sea gull flies down
and he wants em both
he just running between the 2 cones
trying to keep the other birds away
but not getting anything himself
while they gradually bit by bit
peck away
till he has nothing
left
is that a metaphor for humanity....?
anyway
where is this going...?
i dunno
and i dont care
it just meanders about
like ole man river
these are my thoughts
as they happen
aurora and i had a talk
she said sometimes she cant tell if this is a dream or not
and sometimes she feels shes playing a part in a film
existential angst
then she said
but then, i have only been around 6 years...
sometimes she sleepwalks
and talks in another unknown language
we saw a mercedes today
i said look at that lovely olde car
she said oh dad
its from the 1960s
i said how did you know that?
she said i dunno
i just did....
the waves were very flat today
lots o people enjoying emselves
warm water idyllic day
so that just about wraps 2005 up
1 day to go
watch out someone nassty dont kiss ya at midnite
you gotta avoid em
put some thought in beforehand
have an escape root
dont take too any druggs
dont drink too much booze
moderation, people
dont over do it
if ya gotta drive when yer tripping or drunk
stay on the footpath
its much safer
avoid being choked by streamers
practise safe sex till you get really good at it
make sure yer dessignited driver
has only taken a half
turn up at yer neighbours place at 4 in the morning
off yer face and saying
where are all the chicks?
if people are snorting coke in the bathroom
take a piss in peru
the symmetry ll shock ya...!
if you feel like touching the hostess
and saying
you know
i know im out of it...
but ive always really fancied ya baybee
lets leave you know who behind
and hit a small hotel i know
w/ ensuites and air con
if ya feel like saying it
then just doo it, you cool jerk
if ya get in a fight
dont play clean
spray champagne in their eyes
and tie a knot in yer hanky
do ya know the words to auld lang sine
nope
fuck em then
make em up
or sing a song by MEE
at midnite
dont promise any bastard the moon
dont give any one yer number
if yer find yerself at an opus dei party
spike the punch
or punch the spike
give marijuana cookies to olde "straights"
and watch the funne
as they realise
at 12 oclock
that their whole life has been meaningless
thatll get some real laughs
if youre with fellow bohos
share yer stash graciously
and dont wee in the sink
leave the ouija board behind tho
unless you want to contact the living
if its a pool party
resist urge to jump in butt naked
itll probably
piss off the other guests
watching you climb back out
dont over do the nibblies
chippies and beer
can combine in an unstable manner
dont mix drinks
ie booze and water
dont play party games
where you reveal great chunks of yer "colourful" past
only to be interrogated on the way home
and spending jan 1 in ye olde doghouse
dont double dip
but triple is ok
if yer tripping in someones garden
climb up a tree
and threaten to fly
if you vomit in someones bathroom
let the coke snorters clean it up
if you feel dizzy
its probably just
a grande mal seizure coming on
could be a goode way to leave that dull soiree
order ten cabs
one is sure to turn up
gate crash strangers partyies
tell em sk sent ya
if they aint heard o me
you got the wrong address
if they have
you still got it wrong
invite yerself over to yer exes at midnite
to see if they kept any of yer sk cds
when ya split up
break in if theyre not there
and help yerself to whatever ya want
no one can bust ya
its NYE baybee
so
BEWARE
sk
i always know where to find you
i been thinking about ya a lot
lately
thinking how nice
and kind
and sweet
you can be
that youre there when
i need a soldier to cry on
the way you help me
feel its ok to be me
and the year has nearly gone baby
were you goode this yeare...?
me....?
i was goode and badde..
just shifting ratios
the 3 gunas combining recombining
the past present future exerting its triple pull
us spinning round the sun
the sun spinning round its sun
and that sun spinning too
in wider arcs
time impenetratable
space ever receding in the distance
love, only an ideal
truth pliant , relative
hope for hope
life by life
on and on
the richest guy in australia just died
his investments alone earned him
a million fuckin bux a day
he woke up each morning
and he was 500 grande richer
than when he went to bed
he could have a five minute nap and buy a fender strat
each second he got more than you in a day
now what.....
what good did it all do...?
i dunno
it must be harder to say goodbye when you got so much
harder to let go
life entangles ya
it gives ya reasons to take it seriously
it can turn ya "straight"
my kids threw their half eaten ice cream cones down at the beach
a big alpha sea gull flies down
and he wants em both
he just running between the 2 cones
trying to keep the other birds away
but not getting anything himself
while they gradually bit by bit
peck away
till he has nothing
left
is that a metaphor for humanity....?
anyway
where is this going...?
i dunno
and i dont care
it just meanders about
like ole man river
these are my thoughts
as they happen
aurora and i had a talk
she said sometimes she cant tell if this is a dream or not
and sometimes she feels shes playing a part in a film
existential angst
then she said
but then, i have only been around 6 years...
sometimes she sleepwalks
and talks in another unknown language
we saw a mercedes today
i said look at that lovely olde car
she said oh dad
its from the 1960s
i said how did you know that?
she said i dunno
i just did....
the waves were very flat today
lots o people enjoying emselves
warm water idyllic day
so that just about wraps 2005 up
1 day to go
watch out someone nassty dont kiss ya at midnite
you gotta avoid em
put some thought in beforehand
have an escape root
dont take too any druggs
dont drink too much booze
moderation, people
dont over do it
if ya gotta drive when yer tripping or drunk
stay on the footpath
its much safer
avoid being choked by streamers
practise safe sex till you get really good at it
make sure yer dessignited driver
has only taken a half
turn up at yer neighbours place at 4 in the morning
off yer face and saying
where are all the chicks?
if people are snorting coke in the bathroom
take a piss in peru
the symmetry ll shock ya...!
if you feel like touching the hostess
and saying
you know
i know im out of it...
but ive always really fancied ya baybee
lets leave you know who behind
and hit a small hotel i know
w/ ensuites and air con
if ya feel like saying it
then just doo it, you cool jerk
if ya get in a fight
dont play clean
spray champagne in their eyes
and tie a knot in yer hanky
do ya know the words to auld lang sine
nope
fuck em then
make em up
or sing a song by MEE
at midnite
dont promise any bastard the moon
dont give any one yer number
if yer find yerself at an opus dei party
spike the punch
or punch the spike
give marijuana cookies to olde "straights"
and watch the funne
as they realise
at 12 oclock
that their whole life has been meaningless
thatll get some real laughs
if youre with fellow bohos
share yer stash graciously
and dont wee in the sink
leave the ouija board behind tho
unless you want to contact the living
if its a pool party
resist urge to jump in butt naked
itll probably
piss off the other guests
watching you climb back out
dont over do the nibblies
chippies and beer
can combine in an unstable manner
dont mix drinks
ie booze and water
dont play party games
where you reveal great chunks of yer "colourful" past
only to be interrogated on the way home
and spending jan 1 in ye olde doghouse
dont double dip
but triple is ok
if yer tripping in someones garden
climb up a tree
and threaten to fly
if you vomit in someones bathroom
let the coke snorters clean it up
if you feel dizzy
its probably just
a grande mal seizure coming on
could be a goode way to leave that dull soiree
order ten cabs
one is sure to turn up
gate crash strangers partyies
tell em sk sent ya
if they aint heard o me
you got the wrong address
if they have
you still got it wrong
invite yerself over to yer exes at midnite
to see if they kept any of yer sk cds
when ya split up
break in if theyre not there
and help yerself to whatever ya want
no one can bust ya
its NYE baybee
so
BEWARE
sk
Thursday, December 29, 2005
blogged down in a hot swamp
sunburnt
yes
i am
too much sun
burn baby burn
oooh touchy touchy
ah dont pat my back man
aloe vera
calamine lotion
how did this happen to meee?
was talking to rpk bout surfies
what a concept
i had ambitions to be a surfie
with a small hitch that i couldnae actually surf
but the lifestyle certainly appealed to the 17 year olde me
a couple o kids dropped outta our high school
disappeared
turned up 6 months later
jesus
brown as berries
hair turned into blond straw
(which i personally thought was amazing)
faded cool clothes...levi cords
a houndstooth flannel shirt
thongs
and they drove and lived in panel vans
they parked next to beaches
ate vegeburgers and chips
slept in the van
pulled loads of ye olde style surfie gurlss
and generally had this zen air
of indifference to the tawdry proto- "straight"
lives of all of us still at the schooly
wow
i envied those guys
they were like the wild bunch
breakin the law
takin dangerous risks
in every conceivable mannah....!
i dont think many made it thru alive...
they lived outsyde the norms
they interpretated the greene currents and swells
they knocked up pretty gurlss in black van darkness
they roamed the coasts searching for raw kicks
and incredibly subtle pleasures
they got together at night
and tripped by bonfires on the beach
dawn found em still loaded
hurtling across the waves
out of their tiny skulls
you see
being a surfie
was as attractive a career
to a neophyte boho
like me
as being a basse weildin' superstar
both involved no real "work"
"work" is what the "straights" do
i am allergic to instructions
instruct me
and you waste your time
i do not follow maps
cannae assemble kinder surprises
much to daughters dissappointment
cant follow recipes
cant do equations
cant deduce from brochure
cant read stock indexs
doesnt completely understand the rules of
rugby
cricket
base and basket ball
soccer
car racing
voting system
how a car works
why we must have wars
why we are always the goode guys
why they are always the badde guys
why "straights" eat meat in mauseleum mansion
listnin' to robbie willy -ams
and texting on their moby
why bohos drink tao juice and nut cutlets
in their coole padde
with feng shooey
an' everything...
how do you use a logarhythm??
beats me
how many furlongs in a fathom?
i dont recall just now
let x equal y there, kilbey!
sorry sir, i cant...
whats that boy...cant..?....cant...?
it wont go sir
i hannae fuckin idea
about this
or any other
of the arithmetrical
bullshit
you have
been spouting
this
year
sir
good lord boy, do you think you can make a living
playing your damned electric guitar...?
oh mr norris
you had it so sussed
well its certainly getting late here
flat sitting
dont expect this kinda pro liffic
when im back in the i cafes
nope
this is a little yuletide treet
for the faith full
for the thicke and thinners
for the kilbettes
and killbeeings
for the sk-crazy ladies of the knight
for pam and perry
and their parole officer timpkins
for bill
a nightmare on neptune street
yeah see ya next drought you olde shysstah
for gerald who loves fritz fernidand and podcastes
for howie in san diego who loves the crunch
for wilo leading a loverevolution in darkest vulture streets
for the lovely commenterss
who say v. nice things
appreciated my droogies
maintain the rage
fly the sk flagge
if it aint sk...send it away
be kind to yourselves
you are even now
in my heart of hearts
you grace this blogg with your presents and presence
i love thee
so much
BAYBEE!!!
yes
i am
too much sun
burn baby burn
oooh touchy touchy
ah dont pat my back man
aloe vera
calamine lotion
how did this happen to meee?
was talking to rpk bout surfies
what a concept
i had ambitions to be a surfie
with a small hitch that i couldnae actually surf
but the lifestyle certainly appealed to the 17 year olde me
a couple o kids dropped outta our high school
disappeared
turned up 6 months later
jesus
brown as berries
hair turned into blond straw
(which i personally thought was amazing)
faded cool clothes...levi cords
a houndstooth flannel shirt
thongs
and they drove and lived in panel vans
they parked next to beaches
ate vegeburgers and chips
slept in the van
pulled loads of ye olde style surfie gurlss
and generally had this zen air
of indifference to the tawdry proto- "straight"
lives of all of us still at the schooly
wow
i envied those guys
they were like the wild bunch
breakin the law
takin dangerous risks
in every conceivable mannah....!
i dont think many made it thru alive...
they lived outsyde the norms
they interpretated the greene currents and swells
they knocked up pretty gurlss in black van darkness
they roamed the coasts searching for raw kicks
and incredibly subtle pleasures
they got together at night
and tripped by bonfires on the beach
dawn found em still loaded
hurtling across the waves
out of their tiny skulls
you see
being a surfie
was as attractive a career
to a neophyte boho
like me
as being a basse weildin' superstar
both involved no real "work"
"work" is what the "straights" do
i am allergic to instructions
instruct me
and you waste your time
i do not follow maps
cannae assemble kinder surprises
much to daughters dissappointment
cant follow recipes
cant do equations
cant deduce from brochure
cant read stock indexs
doesnt completely understand the rules of
rugby
cricket
base and basket ball
soccer
car racing
voting system
how a car works
why we must have wars
why we are always the goode guys
why they are always the badde guys
why "straights" eat meat in mauseleum mansion
listnin' to robbie willy -ams
and texting on their moby
why bohos drink tao juice and nut cutlets
in their coole padde
with feng shooey
an' everything...
how do you use a logarhythm??
beats me
how many furlongs in a fathom?
i dont recall just now
let x equal y there, kilbey!
sorry sir, i cant...
whats that boy...cant..?....cant...?
it wont go sir
i hannae fuckin idea
about this
or any other
of the arithmetrical
bullshit
you have
been spouting
this
year
sir
good lord boy, do you think you can make a living
playing your damned electric guitar...?
oh mr norris
you had it so sussed
well its certainly getting late here
flat sitting
dont expect this kinda pro liffic
when im back in the i cafes
nope
this is a little yuletide treet
for the faith full
for the thicke and thinners
for the kilbettes
and killbeeings
for the sk-crazy ladies of the knight
for pam and perry
and their parole officer timpkins
for bill
a nightmare on neptune street
yeah see ya next drought you olde shysstah
for gerald who loves fritz fernidand and podcastes
for howie in san diego who loves the crunch
for wilo leading a loverevolution in darkest vulture streets
for the lovely commenterss
who say v. nice things
appreciated my droogies
maintain the rage
fly the sk flagge
if it aint sk...send it away
be kind to yourselves
you are even now
in my heart of hearts
you grace this blogg with your presents and presence
i love thee
so much
BAYBEE!!!
a wanting wardrobe i still explore...
seriously tho
i would be goode as miraz
make sure the head honchos hear about it
spread the word
sk for miraz
or we gonna boycott that thang
im about the right age
already got a medi evil beardy
with touches o white
to signify(as miraz)
authority
and severity
i could be evil and cowardly
hey i could do that in my sweet sleep
then i could be sadly heroic
after being tricked into fighting the youthful caspian
by plotting generals
and of course
lose mah life
honourably....in the end
people
tell em im only asking
a 3 digit figure
tell i got the beardy
will lose earrings and or suntan if nec.
will cultivate oppressive mannerisms
(ask other bouys in the crunch)
will be autocratic and scheming
see above
will be paranoid and self serving
a massive superioty complex....
what am i doing...
assasinatin' my own charactah....?
cos i know you going
"no sk
you aint like that....
you one of goode guys
yer no "$traight"...
are ya....?
sk.....???!"
well i was t'inking again
that perhaps if any "straights" reading this today
would like to hire me
in any capacity
say giving basse lessons to yer bored millionaire twins
or maybe running thru pastels and portraits:the naive and the very fucking naive,
at yer local well paid arte school gig
or maybe on yer board o directeurs
in an advisory esoteric capacity
(and bohos
dont worry
all the squillionss i make
will be channelled directly back into the revolution
laundered thru my bank card natch
and i pledge more rehearsal rooms
for hopeless youf groups
painting lessons for people who arent interested
art appreciation classes for angry philistines
song writing courses for tone deaf oafs
whod rather watch the footy
ballet classes for meat pie eating tilers labourers
poetry for yonder noisy bastards
and yoga for couch potatoes
"get super fit and spiritual, while eating mars bars
and watching dr fill"
then swimming classes for hydrophobiacs
orienteering for people who hate the great outdoors
friendmaking for sociopaths
pathmaking for friendly pathfinders
hobbits basketball
and all the hoopla you could imagine
elect me people
get me into something
a film
a political party
a new years eve party
a new years aurora party
a job in some nice office w/ goode view and swivel chair
get me some connections
use yer clout
collective and individual
i know a lotta of ya are bigwigs
marine biologists
company menne
tycoons
media fucking mogulss
whatever you are...
get me a gig
get me inne
inside the system
in clover
set up for life
make it happen for me, loyal friends
make sks welfare your nyes thingo
get me mah own ivory tower
look down at ya all from
you hoi poloi
you common rude people
get me out of obscurity in bondhemia
let me shimmy and stroll
down the corridors of powder
put me on the front page of the gossip rags
ONE SIDE OF ME EMACIATED
THE OTHER SIDE COMPLETELY OBESE!!
LEAVING A REHAB WITH CATH MOSSY AND BABY STUMBLES
GETTING HITCHED TO NICOLE WINDFREE AND KEEF URBANE
DIVORCING ELLE THE BODY DOUBLE
IN LAS VEGAS OR PARIS HILTIN'
OR BROAD PIT GOES CRAZEE IN BAHAMAS ZOO
AND MY MOTHER WAS AN ALIEN ELVISSS!!!!!
goode mourning my fans and adorers
make it happen
NOW!!!!
i would be goode as miraz
make sure the head honchos hear about it
spread the word
sk for miraz
or we gonna boycott that thang
im about the right age
already got a medi evil beardy
with touches o white
to signify(as miraz)
authority
and severity
i could be evil and cowardly
hey i could do that in my sweet sleep
then i could be sadly heroic
after being tricked into fighting the youthful caspian
by plotting generals
and of course
lose mah life
honourably....in the end
people
tell em im only asking
a 3 digit figure
tell i got the beardy
will lose earrings and or suntan if nec.
will cultivate oppressive mannerisms
(ask other bouys in the crunch)
will be autocratic and scheming
see above
will be paranoid and self serving
a massive superioty complex....
what am i doing...
assasinatin' my own charactah....?
cos i know you going
"no sk
you aint like that....
you one of goode guys
yer no "$traight"...
are ya....?
sk.....???!"
well i was t'inking again
that perhaps if any "straights" reading this today
would like to hire me
in any capacity
say giving basse lessons to yer bored millionaire twins
or maybe running thru pastels and portraits:the naive and the very fucking naive,
at yer local well paid arte school gig
or maybe on yer board o directeurs
in an advisory esoteric capacity
(and bohos
dont worry
all the squillionss i make
will be channelled directly back into the revolution
laundered thru my bank card natch
and i pledge more rehearsal rooms
for hopeless youf groups
painting lessons for people who arent interested
art appreciation classes for angry philistines
song writing courses for tone deaf oafs
whod rather watch the footy
ballet classes for meat pie eating tilers labourers
poetry for yonder noisy bastards
and yoga for couch potatoes
"get super fit and spiritual, while eating mars bars
and watching dr fill"
then swimming classes for hydrophobiacs
orienteering for people who hate the great outdoors
friendmaking for sociopaths
pathmaking for friendly pathfinders
hobbits basketball
and all the hoopla you could imagine
elect me people
get me into something
a film
a political party
a new years eve party
a new years aurora party
a job in some nice office w/ goode view and swivel chair
get me some connections
use yer clout
collective and individual
i know a lotta of ya are bigwigs
marine biologists
company menne
tycoons
media fucking mogulss
whatever you are...
get me a gig
get me inne
inside the system
in clover
set up for life
make it happen for me, loyal friends
make sks welfare your nyes thingo
get me mah own ivory tower
look down at ya all from
you hoi poloi
you common rude people
get me out of obscurity in bondhemia
let me shimmy and stroll
down the corridors of powder
put me on the front page of the gossip rags
ONE SIDE OF ME EMACIATED
THE OTHER SIDE COMPLETELY OBESE!!
LEAVING A REHAB WITH CATH MOSSY AND BABY STUMBLES
GETTING HITCHED TO NICOLE WINDFREE AND KEEF URBANE
DIVORCING ELLE THE BODY DOUBLE
IN LAS VEGAS OR PARIS HILTIN'
OR BROAD PIT GOES CRAZEE IN BAHAMAS ZOO
AND MY MOTHER WAS AN ALIEN ELVISSS!!!!!
goode mourning my fans and adorers
make it happen
NOW!!!!
prince cashpeein' and the blogscorpions from bondi
more supple a mentary blog
does any of you legions of my fans.......
(and congratulations, by the way, youre a winner!)
does any of you have any connexions
with any o those bigshotss
that are gonna do tha next narnia filme....?
with huge jackson
who whatever that mannes name is....
do any of you know anybody
that knows anybody
whos gonna cast that turkey
cos i gotta bonus for em
sk to play wicked king miraz
cmon mr producer
im a fucking shoe-in for that part
dont get some well known pommy
(oh look, gerald, they got kenny branagh playin' miraz)
dont get some yankee acta spittin ' hollywood dud lines
and useless accent
and im sorry to that manne
who wrote in to this show
saying why shouldnt the wolvies have american accents....?
because
i am
after cs himself
the one true interpretah of all things narnian
I WILL DECIDE
MY DECISION IS :
NO. REPEAT.NO AMERICAN ACCENTS IN FUCKING NARNIA
NOHOW.NEVER,
sorry to pull rank
but
cmon
im channelling lewis right now
and he wants to know....
whats hollywoody gonna do about the calormenes
who worship a hideous living death bird god
who invade and enslave the anglo centric narnia
and eventually bring about the end of ye olde worlde
they revile aslan as a devil
and
people
lets face it
they are clearly some kinda middle eastern dudes
they are illustrated thus
on narnias judgement day
all but one or two
pass into shadow
on aslans badde side
no before ya start fussin at me
there is a reason that narnia is anglo centric
itsin the musicians nephew
wherein the white bitch first turns up
w/ black hair and snow white skin
and narnias first kingy
is a lunnon hansom cab driver
so its only natural that they should speak
like the pommies
and/but not like the yankees
back to clive and mes other problem
i cannae see the calormene thing happnin
with things this sensitive
so may we recommend a substitution
in the movie, that is,
of "straights" instead of calormenes
the evil "straights" who live in the desert
who come to narnia
kill the beasts
cut down the talking fucking trees, people
saw off unihorns corns
and a load of other eville
and totally genocidal olde nasty
bollocks
and then
get cast in to ye olde abyss
FOR ETERNITY, BAYBEE
good lord
its perfect
now
onto sumpthing elsewhere
please dont use my comments for yer own blogging
i now know how to delete
and i will waste no opportunity
to send yon commento
to magnetic heaven
if i deem it not something
to do with ME
sorry
you know who you all are
don' get me wRONg
i love ya baybee
but im a gonna delete ya
if ya over doo it again
on my little parade here...
now....
any of ya got a lil poem to write....?
yeah.....?
well dont do it here...
these comments should be
lavish praise
ore
bitterest scorne
i dinae care if you think you wanna diss mee
but no poems
blogs
incantations
memoirs
advice
recipes
cheerios
or anything else
that does nae pertain
to me right here
this sk
in front of yer screen
burning the midnight lamp
to reprimand you zealots
DONT FUCK WITH MY BLOGG
ok
thats better
look out
i got that delete button ready
dont make me do it
throw down that verbose comment
and come out
drop the mouse, mister
the jib is up
yore fucking nicked, me olde son
does any of you legions of my fans.......
(and congratulations, by the way, youre a winner!)
does any of you have any connexions
with any o those bigshotss
that are gonna do tha next narnia filme....?
with huge jackson
who whatever that mannes name is....
do any of you know anybody
that knows anybody
whos gonna cast that turkey
cos i gotta bonus for em
sk to play wicked king miraz
cmon mr producer
im a fucking shoe-in for that part
dont get some well known pommy
(oh look, gerald, they got kenny branagh playin' miraz)
dont get some yankee acta spittin ' hollywood dud lines
and useless accent
and im sorry to that manne
who wrote in to this show
saying why shouldnt the wolvies have american accents....?
because
i am
after cs himself
the one true interpretah of all things narnian
I WILL DECIDE
MY DECISION IS :
NO. REPEAT.NO AMERICAN ACCENTS IN FUCKING NARNIA
NOHOW.NEVER,
sorry to pull rank
but
cmon
im channelling lewis right now
and he wants to know....
whats hollywoody gonna do about the calormenes
who worship a hideous living death bird god
who invade and enslave the anglo centric narnia
and eventually bring about the end of ye olde worlde
they revile aslan as a devil
and
people
lets face it
they are clearly some kinda middle eastern dudes
they are illustrated thus
on narnias judgement day
all but one or two
pass into shadow
on aslans badde side
no before ya start fussin at me
there is a reason that narnia is anglo centric
itsin the musicians nephew
wherein the white bitch first turns up
w/ black hair and snow white skin
and narnias first kingy
is a lunnon hansom cab driver
so its only natural that they should speak
like the pommies
and/but not like the yankees
back to clive and mes other problem
i cannae see the calormene thing happnin
with things this sensitive
so may we recommend a substitution
in the movie, that is,
of "straights" instead of calormenes
the evil "straights" who live in the desert
who come to narnia
kill the beasts
cut down the talking fucking trees, people
saw off unihorns corns
and a load of other eville
and totally genocidal olde nasty
bollocks
and then
get cast in to ye olde abyss
FOR ETERNITY, BAYBEE
good lord
its perfect
now
onto sumpthing elsewhere
please dont use my comments for yer own blogging
i now know how to delete
and i will waste no opportunity
to send yon commento
to magnetic heaven
if i deem it not something
to do with ME
sorry
you know who you all are
don' get me wRONg
i love ya baybee
but im a gonna delete ya
if ya over doo it again
on my little parade here...
now....
any of ya got a lil poem to write....?
yeah.....?
well dont do it here...
these comments should be
lavish praise
ore
bitterest scorne
i dinae care if you think you wanna diss mee
but no poems
blogs
incantations
memoirs
advice
recipes
cheerios
or anything else
that does nae pertain
to me right here
this sk
in front of yer screen
burning the midnight lamp
to reprimand you zealots
DONT FUCK WITH MY BLOGG
ok
thats better
look out
i got that delete button ready
dont make me do it
throw down that verbose comment
and come out
drop the mouse, mister
the jib is up
yore fucking nicked, me olde son
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
can i have a bag, dad...?
huge day
huge walk
from bondi to bronte
(bronte saw us)
and back
was standing in the turbulent sea
and i was t'inking , sk,
youre about to be clobbered
when a huge wave rolled in
carrying a large islander type man
who landed on your humbug heros head
oh weirdness
felt dizzy
world goin' round and round
(well it does that anyway.ED}
whoa neddy
fuzz coming down ovah mah eyes
feely shakey shaky
the sun then rears its heady
(itd been cloudy up till now)
sk gotta lil sunstroke
not as nice as breaststroke
not even as nice as two stroke
oh and howie
its freakin hot downunder tonite
as i walk home thru bronte
tamarama
bondi itself
i pontificate why do i live here
its for the alleyways behind the shops
the brick walls w/ frangipani trees
the kids playin' in the streets at dusk
the surfers...what gentlemen...
the cafes
the bars
the sheer number of fuckin tourists
the bondi boheemians
y' know whoo you are
the pavillion
the back gardens
i wish that for you in the grip of dismal winter
you could feel this summer night
oh sk
we all know by now how
you love a hot nite
dont labour the point, you olde heatseeker
but its magic, nonetheless
its insinuating so much stuff
all at once
its very romantic, gurly schmaltz put
its big and sexy
like the end of the world
its all around us
like prana
like vishnu
something happening on nights such as this
the music on the air
night insects
just another night creature
strangest features
i wish you were all here with me right now
as ya know
im a horrendous type
and a horrendous typist too
so this is one finger agony
for mee
if ye were here
i could pour my stream o consciousness
rants and ramblings
straight to yer pineal gland baybee
via mah velvety husky voice
and mah hip knot tic grey blue eyes
imparting my wishdom
direct feed, my sweetest darlingss
bang
nevermind all that tosh
pam and perry have
returned from their holidaze
in dopey hollow
although sk
currently sampling some fine emergency indoor brand
looking forward to p and ps
usual fare
the one that kicked the visitors
into overdrive cruz control
hang on a minute!
why dontcha grow up....?
an olde hippy goin on about his weed
how scintillatin'
how cutting hedge
how fuckin' novelle
sorry mah non inhaling flunkees
no more pot references
fuck it man
its time to fill this bloggy up
with something to inspire people
get a goode education
become coggy in yon machine
get a hills hoist
get a network of buddies
in the "straight" world
watch footy on satday and sunday
with em
while ya wife serves yas
beer and crisps
dressed in a negligee
plan holidays at time share resorts
in gated communities
so you never have to see the
fucking localss
work yer way up the corpo-rat ladder
till yer the big fat important bossy little boss
the one with a golde credit card
and a subscription to hustler
drink at the rex bar
with jimmy from work
and his mates wazza and jonesy
pick up divorcees
or belt some smaller than you little jerk
get in yer 4 wheeler
and drive home pissed
and have yer stake fuckin diane
with cholesterol gravy flavoured entrail bits
never think of the unfortunate creature
that you just ate
or of its miserable life
before it was a grey lump
in yer belly
beat the missus
if you cant maker
understand
how you abhor violence
i dunno
go to fuckin weight watchers
and pick up lonely chubbs
shave yer chest
(gurlss, this can be tricky)
swagger instead of walking
shout instead of speaking
threaten rather than communikate
you get the picture
yes folks
its the ante diluvian
anti-"straight" rap
and it has one flavour
and that is vanilla bile
and all to cover up
my guilt
at boring ya
with all that tired olde drugg lingo
so ok
we know drugg lingo
and "$traight$" are badde...
so what elsie is gnu
hmmmmmm....
what are the crunch up to?
nuthin!
solo albums?
nada
painting?
not a veggie sausage
hows scarlet?
fine, thanks
hows xmas so far?
ok
have ya hadda nuff for one knight?
uh huh...
thats it folks
go back to yer networking
keep on schmoozing
dont do anything
i wouldnt do
ha ha ha
(insert own farewell line here)
THE END
huge walk
from bondi to bronte
(bronte saw us)
and back
was standing in the turbulent sea
and i was t'inking , sk,
youre about to be clobbered
when a huge wave rolled in
carrying a large islander type man
who landed on your humbug heros head
oh weirdness
felt dizzy
world goin' round and round
(well it does that anyway.ED}
whoa neddy
fuzz coming down ovah mah eyes
feely shakey shaky
the sun then rears its heady
(itd been cloudy up till now)
sk gotta lil sunstroke
not as nice as breaststroke
not even as nice as two stroke
oh and howie
its freakin hot downunder tonite
as i walk home thru bronte
tamarama
bondi itself
i pontificate why do i live here
its for the alleyways behind the shops
the brick walls w/ frangipani trees
the kids playin' in the streets at dusk
the surfers...what gentlemen...
the cafes
the bars
the sheer number of fuckin tourists
the bondi boheemians
y' know whoo you are
the pavillion
the back gardens
i wish that for you in the grip of dismal winter
you could feel this summer night
oh sk
we all know by now how
you love a hot nite
dont labour the point, you olde heatseeker
but its magic, nonetheless
its insinuating so much stuff
all at once
its very romantic, gurly schmaltz put
its big and sexy
like the end of the world
its all around us
like prana
like vishnu
something happening on nights such as this
the music on the air
night insects
just another night creature
strangest features
i wish you were all here with me right now
as ya know
im a horrendous type
and a horrendous typist too
so this is one finger agony
for mee
if ye were here
i could pour my stream o consciousness
rants and ramblings
straight to yer pineal gland baybee
via mah velvety husky voice
and mah hip knot tic grey blue eyes
imparting my wishdom
direct feed, my sweetest darlingss
bang
nevermind all that tosh
pam and perry have
returned from their holidaze
in dopey hollow
although sk
currently sampling some fine emergency indoor brand
looking forward to p and ps
usual fare
the one that kicked the visitors
into overdrive cruz control
hang on a minute!
why dontcha grow up....?
an olde hippy goin on about his weed
how scintillatin'
how cutting hedge
how fuckin' novelle
sorry mah non inhaling flunkees
no more pot references
fuck it man
its time to fill this bloggy up
with something to inspire people
get a goode education
become coggy in yon machine
get a hills hoist
get a network of buddies
in the "straight" world
watch footy on satday and sunday
with em
while ya wife serves yas
beer and crisps
dressed in a negligee
plan holidays at time share resorts
in gated communities
so you never have to see the
fucking localss
work yer way up the corpo-rat ladder
till yer the big fat important bossy little boss
the one with a golde credit card
and a subscription to hustler
drink at the rex bar
with jimmy from work
and his mates wazza and jonesy
pick up divorcees
or belt some smaller than you little jerk
get in yer 4 wheeler
and drive home pissed
and have yer stake fuckin diane
with cholesterol gravy flavoured entrail bits
never think of the unfortunate creature
that you just ate
or of its miserable life
before it was a grey lump
in yer belly
beat the missus
if you cant maker
understand
how you abhor violence
i dunno
go to fuckin weight watchers
and pick up lonely chubbs
shave yer chest
(gurlss, this can be tricky)
swagger instead of walking
shout instead of speaking
threaten rather than communikate
you get the picture
yes folks
its the ante diluvian
anti-"straight" rap
and it has one flavour
and that is vanilla bile
and all to cover up
my guilt
at boring ya
with all that tired olde drugg lingo
so ok
we know drugg lingo
and "$traight$" are badde...
so what elsie is gnu
hmmmmmm....
what are the crunch up to?
nuthin!
solo albums?
nada
painting?
not a veggie sausage
hows scarlet?
fine, thanks
hows xmas so far?
ok
have ya hadda nuff for one knight?
uh huh...
thats it folks
go back to yer networking
keep on schmoozing
dont do anything
i wouldnt do
ha ha ha
(insert own farewell line here)
THE END
which line in which wardrobe...?
what a day
feels like it went on for a year
tis truly a measure of my devo shun
that im even up, writing to you
my kilbeings
my little vege sausages
my lambs
my little bits
just for you
(CUE MUSIC)
anyhow i have done a lot
a gig no less
with david lane + band
(i sublimate my swollen ego
and just play the basse)
jesus
rock legends abound
lucky jim elliot from the cruel sea on drums
amanda brown from the go bes on mando and vio
(robbery with violins)
stevie k from ye olde choich,,,,
3 livin legends
on stage in bondi to a roomful of oblivious euro backpackerss
and the localss who had drifted in to
try to crack on to the euro backpackerss
they just talked and laughed thru laneys set
even tho we were great
i looked around
naiive and hopeful
is captain mish mash here
with one of his exotic friends?
perhaps luxsore
she of the elegant turn o frase
or maybe
hotrodde
or maybe even
transylvanian vlad
who is also a talented writah
and charming
but also prone to a hot slavic temper
or something...
who even told me to get fucked last time.....
(and that, me dahlings,IS fucken heresy)....
but no
there was no one there enjoying this feast of sounds
we were sloppy but goode
i personally made one very awful glaring mistake
early on
a whacking e minor run
when i shoulda been pumping an f
believe me
its just about the worse sounding thing in the book
the whole room slipped sideways
in to negative space (baybee)
for the duration of that howler
laney,
dock my fucking pay !
i deserve it
and
as the brilliantly astute ones here
wood have already guessed
i saw banarnia the moovie
goode things :
(trust me, i know my $%#$%&ing narnia, fiendss)
mr tumnus...yeah pretty goode
the kidss...i liked em
edmund looked like a young i mccullough
that aint a badde thing
no
i liked the kids
didnae mind aslan
scenery was goode
badde things
all the narnians had ears that looked like the beagle boys
tilda aint jadis
she just aint
sorry
hopeless
the white which didnt have blonde dreadies
she was just....
maybe im just inflewents
by pauline baines excellent illustrations
but she and lewis = sir john tenniel and lewis carroll
hers is the definitive version
the wolvies all spoke in these super horrendous
yankee accents
maugrim the wolf the chief of the secret police
does not have a namerican accent
he just doesnt!!
and he doesnt jive around with the fuckin kiddies
in comic book/rambo/lethal weppon banter
hes much more sophisticated than that
the battle scenes
silly
an attempt to cash in on you know whats
big suck sess
narnian battles were small
like maybe a hundred creatures maxx!
not row after row
of superimposed holly would
stoopid lookin' idiots
with horns or one eyeball
or whatever
(fill in silly computer narnian here)
why fuck w/ a good storey
look at troy
(NO DONT!!)
you just dont get some
bloke to re write homer
or lewis
or j r r r r toke it in
(pipeweed.....go j.r.)
never mind
we still give it a thumbsup
next time
drop the action stuffe
the u.s. accents
(but howie, theaudience loved those freakin wolves)
and
ok thats enuff
im gonna leave you now
love
s the k
feels like it went on for a year
tis truly a measure of my devo shun
that im even up, writing to you
my kilbeings
my little vege sausages
my lambs
my little bits
just for you
(CUE MUSIC)
anyhow i have done a lot
a gig no less
with david lane + band
(i sublimate my swollen ego
and just play the basse)
jesus
rock legends abound
lucky jim elliot from the cruel sea on drums
amanda brown from the go bes on mando and vio
(robbery with violins)
stevie k from ye olde choich,,,,
3 livin legends
on stage in bondi to a roomful of oblivious euro backpackerss
and the localss who had drifted in to
try to crack on to the euro backpackerss
they just talked and laughed thru laneys set
even tho we were great
i looked around
naiive and hopeful
is captain mish mash here
with one of his exotic friends?
perhaps luxsore
she of the elegant turn o frase
or maybe
hotrodde
or maybe even
transylvanian vlad
who is also a talented writah
and charming
but also prone to a hot slavic temper
or something...
who even told me to get fucked last time.....
(and that, me dahlings,IS fucken heresy)....
but no
there was no one there enjoying this feast of sounds
we were sloppy but goode
i personally made one very awful glaring mistake
early on
a whacking e minor run
when i shoulda been pumping an f
believe me
its just about the worse sounding thing in the book
the whole room slipped sideways
in to negative space (baybee)
for the duration of that howler
laney,
dock my fucking pay !
i deserve it
and
as the brilliantly astute ones here
wood have already guessed
i saw banarnia the moovie
goode things :
(trust me, i know my $%#$%&ing narnia, fiendss)
mr tumnus...yeah pretty goode
the kidss...i liked em
edmund looked like a young i mccullough
that aint a badde thing
no
i liked the kids
didnae mind aslan
scenery was goode
badde things
all the narnians had ears that looked like the beagle boys
tilda aint jadis
she just aint
sorry
hopeless
the white which didnt have blonde dreadies
she was just....
maybe im just inflewents
by pauline baines excellent illustrations
but she and lewis = sir john tenniel and lewis carroll
hers is the definitive version
the wolvies all spoke in these super horrendous
yankee accents
maugrim the wolf the chief of the secret police
does not have a namerican accent
he just doesnt!!
and he doesnt jive around with the fuckin kiddies
in comic book/rambo/lethal weppon banter
hes much more sophisticated than that
the battle scenes
silly
an attempt to cash in on you know whats
big suck sess
narnian battles were small
like maybe a hundred creatures maxx!
not row after row
of superimposed holly would
stoopid lookin' idiots
with horns or one eyeball
or whatever
(fill in silly computer narnian here)
why fuck w/ a good storey
look at troy
(NO DONT!!)
you just dont get some
bloke to re write homer
or lewis
or j r r r r toke it in
(pipeweed.....go j.r.)
never mind
we still give it a thumbsup
next time
drop the action stuffe
the u.s. accents
(but howie, theaudience loved those freakin wolves)
and
ok thats enuff
im gonna leave you now
love
s the k
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
we live in the void of metamorphoses
8 02 in the morning
troubled grey sky
overcast mind
feeling like something waiting for me
out there
someting thats gonna bring problems
something wicked
something bad
something from the past
coming back to haunt me
problems i cant contain
foreboding
xmas all gone
that doesnt worry me none
new years eve
dont mean much to me
what could it be...?
barometric pressure?
peer group pressure?
ha ha
i am peerless....
cos youve run out of pot...?
nah, i'll sort that out eventually
oh misery take your hands off me
let me me see ya
so i know whom i am fighting against
dont persecute me with yer vague whispers and threats
perhaps too much time
on computer
sk suffering from electro-magnetic pollution
(all for your sake, my preciousses)
sk plagued by little bickerers
sk hounded by bad conscience
sk sensitive to mobile phones
the smell of meat
too much tv
(please....turn it off)
horrible music in the air
(or is it just my tinnitus?)
feeling frail
feeling mortal
tho for no real reason
come on, sk, cheer us up a little
we logged on for a laff
not for your maudlin old tripe
i wish i was drivin along with tim again
between noosa and brisbane
when our tour was yet one day olde
for a few hours my universe was defined
the interior of our tarago van
the radio playing some weird olde station
talking things over
as we accelarated through the warm drizzle
wilo, are ya out there
i miss ya buddy
it was a goode time, wasnt it?
i wish i was a twin
e and m
a and e
they never seem lonely
always got each other
me........
ive always felt on my own
only tiny little times
here and there
when i feel un-isolated
whoa sk
you succumbing to some heavy melancholia, olde pal
no wonder
you havent done yer laps for a while
youve done very little yoga
yer meditations have been half hearted
it doesnt keep going
if you neglect the infrastructure
i have to run as hard as i can
to stay in the same place......
or all my songs
and words
come back to bite me on the arse
at times like these
jesus
i gotta get away from this
radiation spitting machine
from this screen
sending out its death rays inta mah soul
i gotta pull the plug
i gotta get in the sea
i gotta get in the astral
i gotta get some pure clean food and air
i am a vintage sports car
and i need a lotta lookin after
you cant thrash me up and down
the highway too much
man
you self centred old s. o .b
you soft centred coffee cream
that last chokky in the box
that no one fancies....
SNAP OUTTA IT, olde bean
i will speak to you all
later
signed
me
troubled grey sky
overcast mind
feeling like something waiting for me
out there
someting thats gonna bring problems
something wicked
something bad
something from the past
coming back to haunt me
problems i cant contain
foreboding
xmas all gone
that doesnt worry me none
new years eve
dont mean much to me
what could it be...?
barometric pressure?
peer group pressure?
ha ha
i am peerless....
cos youve run out of pot...?
nah, i'll sort that out eventually
oh misery take your hands off me
let me me see ya
so i know whom i am fighting against
dont persecute me with yer vague whispers and threats
perhaps too much time
on computer
sk suffering from electro-magnetic pollution
(all for your sake, my preciousses)
sk plagued by little bickerers
sk hounded by bad conscience
sk sensitive to mobile phones
the smell of meat
too much tv
(please....turn it off)
horrible music in the air
(or is it just my tinnitus?)
feeling frail
feeling mortal
tho for no real reason
come on, sk, cheer us up a little
we logged on for a laff
not for your maudlin old tripe
i wish i was drivin along with tim again
between noosa and brisbane
when our tour was yet one day olde
for a few hours my universe was defined
the interior of our tarago van
the radio playing some weird olde station
talking things over
as we accelarated through the warm drizzle
wilo, are ya out there
i miss ya buddy
it was a goode time, wasnt it?
i wish i was a twin
e and m
a and e
they never seem lonely
always got each other
me........
ive always felt on my own
only tiny little times
here and there
when i feel un-isolated
whoa sk
you succumbing to some heavy melancholia, olde pal
no wonder
you havent done yer laps for a while
youve done very little yoga
yer meditations have been half hearted
it doesnt keep going
if you neglect the infrastructure
i have to run as hard as i can
to stay in the same place......
or all my songs
and words
come back to bite me on the arse
at times like these
jesus
i gotta get away from this
radiation spitting machine
from this screen
sending out its death rays inta mah soul
i gotta pull the plug
i gotta get in the sea
i gotta get in the astral
i gotta get some pure clean food and air
i am a vintage sports car
and i need a lotta lookin after
you cant thrash me up and down
the highway too much
man
you self centred old s. o .b
you soft centred coffee cream
that last chokky in the box
that no one fancies....
SNAP OUTTA IT, olde bean
i will speak to you all
later
signed
me
Monday, December 26, 2005
blogxing day night
its over
boxing day
another day in m'life over and done
we swam
we ate
we washed up
we walked up a hill and looked at syddley
the hubba bridge
the oprah house
the lites
we looked at the pacific o
stretching away to the horizon
impervious
containing deep mysteries
(leviathan, to name but one)
loads o people on beach
loads o sun burne
loads o sore and sorry celtic type backpackerss to morrow
you just gotta know it
a man lying on a silver aluminium mat
frying in coconut oil
no thanks
im a vegetarian
many people in gee strings
who had no business wearing em
the gay guys have the best bodies
abdomens like concrete
buns o steeele etc
the heter os all pasty flabby
and gone to the dogs
go figure skate
hardly any waves
more like the mediterranean
had bruschetta for lunchy
oh dear sk
have ya dried up
will ya stoop to telling em what ya had for lunchy?
that wont get back the dwindling xmas traffic
on yer blogsite
(its true, look at the counter)
i thought i was a bigger pull than xmas
but
sadly
i was wrong
rode a bike
ran out of pot
hope the dealers aint gone on holidaze, sk
looks like ya miss calculayted a little
what a time to run out....
oh i hate it
when their mobile doesnt even ring
it goes straight to the answering machine
"hi, you reached pam and perry
we cant take yer call
cos we're miles away from sydney
so if you called up wanting dope..
you gotta be jokin'
see ya in 2006"
sk must swallow pridey
must ring olde deelahs
whom he had abandoned
long time ago
sk :is this bill ?
bill: yep
sk ; hi its steve....steve kilbey.....!
bill ;yep
sk : i's wundring if you got any ....
bill : nope
click
fuck
bastard!
i didnae want his fuckin purple heads no how
i'd much rather sit here straight
sober and clean
and blogg on regardless
maybe i 'll just give bill another try
just in case
sk : hello bill
bill : sorry mate
i already told ya..
sk : but bill
how would you like an autographed copy of el momento descuidado..?
bill : whos it by?
sk: the choich!!!
bill : nope
click
fuck
bastard
fine
im gonna be straight then
no worries
im sure i can write sumpthing while im straight
.......
.......
.........
,,,
......
it'll come, for sure....
ok
im gonna go round bills house
make him see how serious i am
let him see how big
and possibly dangerous i look
in the dark
hang on
i think hes got some plants growing in ye olde backe yarde
over the fence i go
oooh there they are
wow....
"oh hello bill
just came round to slip this cd under yer back door anyways..
whats that....?
come in fer a smoke....?
well, i dinae really have the time
but....
alright...
fuck it
just a quick one
then i must get back to mah blogging
whats a blog, do ya say, bill...?
its mah online diary
where i write about mah life
even stuff like this....
ha ha
even about drug deelahs like you
bill davidson
ha ha
of 2/76 neptune st
west bondi
nsw 2026
ha ha
this blogging
its a peace of cake!
boxing day
another day in m'life over and done
we swam
we ate
we washed up
we walked up a hill and looked at syddley
the hubba bridge
the oprah house
the lites
we looked at the pacific o
stretching away to the horizon
impervious
containing deep mysteries
(leviathan, to name but one)
loads o people on beach
loads o sun burne
loads o sore and sorry celtic type backpackerss to morrow
you just gotta know it
a man lying on a silver aluminium mat
frying in coconut oil
no thanks
im a vegetarian
many people in gee strings
who had no business wearing em
the gay guys have the best bodies
abdomens like concrete
buns o steeele etc
the heter os all pasty flabby
and gone to the dogs
go figure skate
hardly any waves
more like the mediterranean
had bruschetta for lunchy
oh dear sk
have ya dried up
will ya stoop to telling em what ya had for lunchy?
that wont get back the dwindling xmas traffic
on yer blogsite
(its true, look at the counter)
i thought i was a bigger pull than xmas
but
sadly
i was wrong
rode a bike
ran out of pot
hope the dealers aint gone on holidaze, sk
looks like ya miss calculayted a little
what a time to run out....
oh i hate it
when their mobile doesnt even ring
it goes straight to the answering machine
"hi, you reached pam and perry
we cant take yer call
cos we're miles away from sydney
so if you called up wanting dope..
you gotta be jokin'
see ya in 2006"
sk must swallow pridey
must ring olde deelahs
whom he had abandoned
long time ago
sk :is this bill ?
bill: yep
sk ; hi its steve....steve kilbey.....!
bill ;yep
sk : i's wundring if you got any ....
bill : nope
click
fuck
bastard!
i didnae want his fuckin purple heads no how
i'd much rather sit here straight
sober and clean
and blogg on regardless
maybe i 'll just give bill another try
just in case
sk : hello bill
bill : sorry mate
i already told ya..
sk : but bill
how would you like an autographed copy of el momento descuidado..?
bill : whos it by?
sk: the choich!!!
bill : nope
click
fuck
bastard
fine
im gonna be straight then
no worries
im sure i can write sumpthing while im straight
.......
.......
.........
,,,
......
it'll come, for sure....
ok
im gonna go round bills house
make him see how serious i am
let him see how big
and possibly dangerous i look
in the dark
hang on
i think hes got some plants growing in ye olde backe yarde
over the fence i go
oooh there they are
wow....
"oh hello bill
just came round to slip this cd under yer back door anyways..
whats that....?
come in fer a smoke....?
well, i dinae really have the time
but....
alright...
fuck it
just a quick one
then i must get back to mah blogging
whats a blog, do ya say, bill...?
its mah online diary
where i write about mah life
even stuff like this....
ha ha
even about drug deelahs like you
bill davidson
ha ha
of 2/76 neptune st
west bondi
nsw 2026
ha ha
this blogging
its a peace of cake!
i am just a poor bouy, tho mah storeys seldom tolde
boxxing day, fiends
hip hip hooray
now i know ya dont have boxxing day in the usa
tough luck, you american idles
cos us aussies
and pommies
are just gonna have all the fucken fun
ourselves
boxxing day
calloo callay
i chortled in my joy
strange out there on streeties
exxed up party goers
collide with fambleys on the way for
early morning swimmy
out there a party still struggles on
despite daylight
despite the prevailing of common sense
the partys over, you idiots
go home
have a nice warm bath
and pray you aint gonna feel
like we both know you gonna feel
tomorrow
what goes up
must come down
as above
so below
that stuff you took
just sucked every goode thing
it could find in the very fuckin' marrow
of yer boddy
oh yeah
just like a loco motive
running on full steam
yer eccy pill
or whatever the hell that was keeping yer engines o pleasure
burnin' all nite long
HOWEVER
and its a big however, baybee
HOWEVER
to do that
it took next weeks energy
and tomorrows good mood
and next tuesdays endorphins
you were gonna need them
after your tennis match with gerald
so i dunno
will you use this sage advice yourself, sk?
no, probably not....
but at least i have identified the time theft principle
for ya
so remember
dont look on the drug as the thing itself
its more like a thug
who coshes the dude in yer nervous system
who normally doles out the good feelings
a little more cautiously
ah
im a walking fountain o' knowledge
for all things sacred and profane
why hasnt some govement
why hasnt some huge corp
some org.
hired me
in an advisory capacity natch
i must admit ole sk lucked out again
my new lil baby scarlet
is very civilised
for someone of 9 weekes olde
lovely moddish black hairdo
we all like to do it our own way
after her bathy
and shes seems to have been on this ride before
(surprise surprise)
she already knows the ropes
does all the right stuff
good on ya baby bouncer !
my mum came round yesterday
we watch a new dvd (the 80s sumpthin')
its got the choich
doin ungarded gnome tent
on countdown circa 1981
how excruciatingly awful
how hilarious and sombering
how everything and nuthin'
strange scenes on bondi beach yessaday
many coppers
some in the special division gear
marchin' up an down
getting their gators wet
posing for pictures with yon pretty gurls
and chil'ren
protecting uss from our fuckin' selves
whoah
thats pathetic
havent we learned one damn thing?
will we ever learn one damn thing?
is it even possible?
does this planet seem like an obstacle course to you 2
does it seem to have mechanisms built into it
that are there to make it so much bloody harder?
doesnt seem that just when ya stretch out yer hand
to claim yer reward
the manne appears
no no sk
(INSERT YER OWN INITIALS IF YER LIKE)
you didnt pay yer blah blah blah
or fill in yer blah blah blah
or declare yer palace in india
or yer oil wells in ireland
or yer apartment above miracle street
everytime you think its gonna happen for ya
theres that manne
cheerfully trampling on yer dreams
fucking up the world for the other 99.9 per cent of us
who jus' wanna (space) rock
and bring up our dutiful daughters
who wants to fight in a fuckin' war?
just this tiny tiny tiny lil bunch
of blood thirsty cowardssss
they leave it all to us proles
(at least in ye olde olden days
the king men were the 1st up the
fuckin' front of le battle)
the kinda pricks you wouldnt hire for any other gig
cos theyre too stupid dishonest and ugly
you know the @#&^ers im talkin of
the ones who always you-naminously vote themselves a raise
the ones who got yer grandfathers killed
the ones in the fuckin suits with the weird smiles
the reptilians
the greedy vicious priveleged little ratbagges
jesus, sk
what a rant
the white houses on yer tail now
visas cancelled mysteriously
(christ, theyre not so keene on me , as it is!!)
men in dark suits followin me home from yoga
navy seals in the ice bergs poole
( i will not follow you to the seal line)
helicopters hovering outside
while my hands rockin' the cradle
miked up dolphinss swimming wid me
in the briny waves
bugging devices in the veg cafes
(i'll have a tempeh burgah and soy sedition pie)
fuck em
they cant bust sk
they fear the wrath of the bohemianss
the white witches
the olde hippies
the acupuncturists
the past life regressors
the guitar pickers
la poetss
the surfers
the nudistss
the yoga teachers
the naturopaths
the whales
potters
winos
dreamers
goths
they couldnae stand up to our collective might
imagine if the bohemian empire was to suddenly disappear?
itd be like 1950s all over again
before sgt pepper and pot n acid
destroyed the "straights" veneer
and exposed the ugly brutal pointlessness
of their evil schemes
but
my bohemian conspirateurs
but
if it wasnt for uss
theyd have no one to persecute
no one to holde downe
no one to smother
manipulate
harangue
and harass
make 2006 a bohemian year, you fiendss
i enjoin you on this task
i crave 100 per cent bohemian ness from ya all
do something bohemian this boxxing day
blow a spliff in a "straights"ss face
drop acid and admire the flowers
in the botanic gardens where the "straights"
are havin their bar b q
tell em ya dont dig their disgustin altar
tell em ya dont believe in workin for the manne
tell em yer dont care fer their pig fat
or their hairspray
wear floral or paisley, that'll show em
wear elephant cords by lee cooper
wear bearcat jeans
wear anti-lopes and zigger jackets
wear beatle boots or thongs
wear flowers in yer hair
if ya got no hair
get a hare
and make him wear the flowers
look at the clouds
and appreciate gods supreme talent as an artist
kiss someone cute whos a bohemian an' say
you know....yore really special....
project nice thoughts to the birds
theyre waiting for it
stand on the beach
or in the towne square
and scream
i cant believe that (insert name here of leader)
iss the best fuckin leader we could fuckin find in this country!!!
cmon people
sk for governor general now
i got the uk-aust-us-euro- links down
im a genius
(arent i?)
im handsome in a statesmen like way
(aftah mah makeover, natch)
i'll stop all the fuckin argy bargy
legalise the goode stuffe
piss off the badde stuffe
for , like, ever, BAYBEE
and youll never see corruption
graft
or prostitutes
under me
thats right
ring yer congress fuckin' man now
and demand
SK
now
dont wait
remember
all the way
with SJK
hip hip hooray
now i know ya dont have boxxing day in the usa
tough luck, you american idles
cos us aussies
and pommies
are just gonna have all the fucken fun
ourselves
boxxing day
calloo callay
i chortled in my joy
strange out there on streeties
exxed up party goers
collide with fambleys on the way for
early morning swimmy
out there a party still struggles on
despite daylight
despite the prevailing of common sense
the partys over, you idiots
go home
have a nice warm bath
and pray you aint gonna feel
like we both know you gonna feel
tomorrow
what goes up
must come down
as above
so below
that stuff you took
just sucked every goode thing
it could find in the very fuckin' marrow
of yer boddy
oh yeah
just like a loco motive
running on full steam
yer eccy pill
or whatever the hell that was keeping yer engines o pleasure
burnin' all nite long
HOWEVER
and its a big however, baybee
HOWEVER
to do that
it took next weeks energy
and tomorrows good mood
and next tuesdays endorphins
you were gonna need them
after your tennis match with gerald
so i dunno
will you use this sage advice yourself, sk?
no, probably not....
but at least i have identified the time theft principle
for ya
so remember
dont look on the drug as the thing itself
its more like a thug
who coshes the dude in yer nervous system
who normally doles out the good feelings
a little more cautiously
ah
im a walking fountain o' knowledge
for all things sacred and profane
why hasnt some govement
why hasnt some huge corp
some org.
hired me
in an advisory capacity natch
i must admit ole sk lucked out again
my new lil baby scarlet
is very civilised
for someone of 9 weekes olde
lovely moddish black hairdo
we all like to do it our own way
after her bathy
and shes seems to have been on this ride before
(surprise surprise)
she already knows the ropes
does all the right stuff
good on ya baby bouncer !
my mum came round yesterday
we watch a new dvd (the 80s sumpthin')
its got the choich
doin ungarded gnome tent
on countdown circa 1981
how excruciatingly awful
how hilarious and sombering
how everything and nuthin'
strange scenes on bondi beach yessaday
many coppers
some in the special division gear
marchin' up an down
getting their gators wet
posing for pictures with yon pretty gurls
and chil'ren
protecting uss from our fuckin' selves
whoah
thats pathetic
havent we learned one damn thing?
will we ever learn one damn thing?
is it even possible?
does this planet seem like an obstacle course to you 2
does it seem to have mechanisms built into it
that are there to make it so much bloody harder?
doesnt seem that just when ya stretch out yer hand
to claim yer reward
the manne appears
no no sk
(INSERT YER OWN INITIALS IF YER LIKE)
you didnt pay yer blah blah blah
or fill in yer blah blah blah
or declare yer palace in india
or yer oil wells in ireland
or yer apartment above miracle street
everytime you think its gonna happen for ya
theres that manne
cheerfully trampling on yer dreams
fucking up the world for the other 99.9 per cent of us
who jus' wanna (space) rock
and bring up our dutiful daughters
who wants to fight in a fuckin' war?
just this tiny tiny tiny lil bunch
of blood thirsty cowardssss
they leave it all to us proles
(at least in ye olde olden days
the king men were the 1st up the
fuckin' front of le battle)
the kinda pricks you wouldnt hire for any other gig
cos theyre too stupid dishonest and ugly
you know the @#&^ers im talkin of
the ones who always you-naminously vote themselves a raise
the ones who got yer grandfathers killed
the ones in the fuckin suits with the weird smiles
the reptilians
the greedy vicious priveleged little ratbagges
jesus, sk
what a rant
the white houses on yer tail now
visas cancelled mysteriously
(christ, theyre not so keene on me , as it is!!)
men in dark suits followin me home from yoga
navy seals in the ice bergs poole
( i will not follow you to the seal line)
helicopters hovering outside
while my hands rockin' the cradle
miked up dolphinss swimming wid me
in the briny waves
bugging devices in the veg cafes
(i'll have a tempeh burgah and soy sedition pie)
fuck em
they cant bust sk
they fear the wrath of the bohemianss
the white witches
the olde hippies
the acupuncturists
the past life regressors
the guitar pickers
la poetss
the surfers
the nudistss
the yoga teachers
the naturopaths
the whales
potters
winos
dreamers
goths
they couldnae stand up to our collective might
imagine if the bohemian empire was to suddenly disappear?
itd be like 1950s all over again
before sgt pepper and pot n acid
destroyed the "straights" veneer
and exposed the ugly brutal pointlessness
of their evil schemes
but
my bohemian conspirateurs
but
if it wasnt for uss
theyd have no one to persecute
no one to holde downe
no one to smother
manipulate
harangue
and harass
make 2006 a bohemian year, you fiendss
i enjoin you on this task
i crave 100 per cent bohemian ness from ya all
do something bohemian this boxxing day
blow a spliff in a "straights"ss face
drop acid and admire the flowers
in the botanic gardens where the "straights"
are havin their bar b q
tell em ya dont dig their disgustin altar
tell em ya dont believe in workin for the manne
tell em yer dont care fer their pig fat
or their hairspray
wear floral or paisley, that'll show em
wear elephant cords by lee cooper
wear bearcat jeans
wear anti-lopes and zigger jackets
wear beatle boots or thongs
wear flowers in yer hair
if ya got no hair
get a hare
and make him wear the flowers
look at the clouds
and appreciate gods supreme talent as an artist
kiss someone cute whos a bohemian an' say
you know....yore really special....
project nice thoughts to the birds
theyre waiting for it
stand on the beach
or in the towne square
and scream
i cant believe that (insert name here of leader)
iss the best fuckin leader we could fuckin find in this country!!!
cmon people
sk for governor general now
i got the uk-aust-us-euro- links down
im a genius
(arent i?)
im handsome in a statesmen like way
(aftah mah makeover, natch)
i'll stop all the fuckin argy bargy
legalise the goode stuffe
piss off the badde stuffe
for , like, ever, BAYBEE
and youll never see corruption
graft
or prostitutes
under me
thats right
ring yer congress fuckin' man now
and demand
SK
now
dont wait
remember
all the way
with SJK
Sunday, December 25, 2005
halcyon daze loggerheads set
as promised
xmas night special
disproportionate number of oirish backpackers
stumblin' thru bondi streets
clutching slabs o beer
warm aromatic night
surrounded by distant celebration
the boomp booomp of a disco
laughs
shouts
cars zoom in n out of earshot
flat sitting
i look out a hillside of apts and bungalows
blocks o flats
and cottages
red neon
yellow neon
a film set almost
sky a dark faded purple
xmas all but gone
still there is boxing day
box o gifts?
boxer dogs ?
boxer rebellion?
boxer shorts?
boxer bloody ears?
boxing day is a poor mannes xmas
imagine being born on boxing day
imagine that....
today i saw muslims in santa suits
christians in red indian head dress
hindus in the ocean
buddhists flying thru the air
on magic carpets
jains squashing cockroaches
atheists in church
on their bloody knees
i saw men kissing men
women kissing women
old men kissing the sky
young men kissing the earth
the sea kissing the sand
the clouds
remaining aloof
and biblical
ole sk body surf w/ chldrn for hours
a little burnt
a little chafed
a little all-over-the-plaice
the sea heals
no doubt about it
it washes the day off yer back
outta yer hair
how can ya be angry with some
fatbellied record exec
when yer up to yer chin
in pacific o ?
cures yer headaches
washes off neg energy
turns yer hair into cotton wool
makes yer nipples sore
evie somewhat puzzled: mum, my boobies hurt....
a vege burgah in the park opposite beachy
chipps too
the others have some fishy
people on ecstasy leaving yonder dance party
stumble by
happy xmas to yer all....and the baby too...no, i mean it !!
i want some o whatever that druid was on
lovely evenin' guv'nor
yeah, you too mate
brother john made compo cd for me
listnin today
had to laugh at some the stuff
i thought was so goode
once upon a time
terminal street by be bop de luxe
some of it so great
some quite hilarious
just like the choich i spose
elektra n miranda have come home
they have some gifts for me
i should let you go
i should get off here tonite
xmas is dead people
long live boxing day
ess kay
xmas night special
disproportionate number of oirish backpackers
stumblin' thru bondi streets
clutching slabs o beer
warm aromatic night
surrounded by distant celebration
the boomp booomp of a disco
laughs
shouts
cars zoom in n out of earshot
flat sitting
i look out a hillside of apts and bungalows
blocks o flats
and cottages
red neon
yellow neon
a film set almost
sky a dark faded purple
xmas all but gone
still there is boxing day
box o gifts?
boxer dogs ?
boxer rebellion?
boxer shorts?
boxer bloody ears?
boxing day is a poor mannes xmas
imagine being born on boxing day
imagine that....
today i saw muslims in santa suits
christians in red indian head dress
hindus in the ocean
buddhists flying thru the air
on magic carpets
jains squashing cockroaches
atheists in church
on their bloody knees
i saw men kissing men
women kissing women
old men kissing the sky
young men kissing the earth
the sea kissing the sand
the clouds
remaining aloof
and biblical
ole sk body surf w/ chldrn for hours
a little burnt
a little chafed
a little all-over-the-plaice
the sea heals
no doubt about it
it washes the day off yer back
outta yer hair
how can ya be angry with some
fatbellied record exec
when yer up to yer chin
in pacific o ?
cures yer headaches
washes off neg energy
turns yer hair into cotton wool
makes yer nipples sore
evie somewhat puzzled: mum, my boobies hurt....
a vege burgah in the park opposite beachy
chipps too
the others have some fishy
people on ecstasy leaving yonder dance party
stumble by
happy xmas to yer all....and the baby too...no, i mean it !!
i want some o whatever that druid was on
lovely evenin' guv'nor
yeah, you too mate
brother john made compo cd for me
listnin today
had to laugh at some the stuff
i thought was so goode
once upon a time
terminal street by be bop de luxe
some of it so great
some quite hilarious
just like the choich i spose
elektra n miranda have come home
they have some gifts for me
i should let you go
i should get off here tonite
xmas is dead people
long live boxing day
ess kay
sew this, its chrismas
loyalties
dont ya jus' love em
always loyalties
got ole sk caught between two lovers
actin' like a foole
over a barrel
on the horns of a dilemma
eg scene backstage in,say, london
sk standing after having rocked for 2 solid hours
(and rolled for the same period)
sk with glass o champers in one hande
and spliffy w/white widow in other
punter a appears
sk : oh punter a....its you...how are ya, mah friend???
punter a : hi ya man, well ya see mah cat died, mah mother married a prince
in arabia, i got mah ph fucken d at last, and mah brother billy, well, he...
Suddenly punter b turns up
punter b : hey hey ess kay....!
now the painfull part, my groons
does sk cut off punter a and rudely interrupt his story
or does he ignore punter b
who he hasnt seen for 15 years
and who once helped him escape from a turkish jail...?
what i have tended to do is to try to accomodate em both
and usually both have gone off in a huffy
thinkin ole sk is one rude druid
but
i say
but
how many other people hit a city
and thenne suddenly
runne into 27 olde pals at once?
same as now
should i bee home opening the pressies with yon kiddiwinks
OAR
should i be reminiscing here wid chew
my devotee
my favoured one
my true love
my bloggy-woggy-all-in-a-foggy
also elektra and miranda still sleeping in their room
they were up late
wrapping and rapping
coming in my room every time
i was nearly in the arms of morpheus
(read asleep ED)
every time i nearly dropped off...
knock knock
barge inne
(in swedish accent)
just wondering how early you want yer presents, daddy
ITS A FUCKIN MOOT POINT, MAH LIL DAUGHTERS
COS I GET UP AT 6 EVERY DAY
AND YE SLEEPE TILL 11
SO WHY ASK ME THAT NOW???
but i stay silent...
you see....loyalties
and the loyalties between the big twins
and the little twins
here daddy out in the deepe water, where the sharkeys are...!!??
no daddy, you promised youd help us build a sand castle
then
groovy friend of sk whos observin the scene
hey sk me and some friends gonna blow this bone
grab a coffeee
and talk about ye olde art
wanna join us...?
so you see it could bee a 3 way split
or a 4 way street
or even
a penta gone
any how
as i write this
xmas is explding all over austrayliah
"you mean this is all i got?"
"oh how super...an ironing board..!"
"gee thanks kids...a pair of brown socks"
"thats wunderful oscar...i can always use another tea cosy"
"gladys, ta love.....a monogrammed hanky...with yer exs initials..!"
and so on
fill in yer own chrissie gags
ya lazy buggers
why expect me to provide
all the mirth
and
merri
ment
?
any way
i spose i should mosey over chez k
see what satan brought the kids..
see if the raindear manure
will wash outta the rugs
see if my mistletoe has been kissed under
see if my christmas puddy is full o goode cheere
see if the 100 degree heat has melted my santa snow
etc
etc
(insert own xmas cliche here)
(tired of that device, sk ED)
(who is ED sk?)
any way
you gluttonous fiendss
you greedy little *@^%ers
thats it
will bring speshal christmasse nite report
HO HO HO
dont ya jus' love em
always loyalties
got ole sk caught between two lovers
actin' like a foole
over a barrel
on the horns of a dilemma
eg scene backstage in,say, london
sk standing after having rocked for 2 solid hours
(and rolled for the same period)
sk with glass o champers in one hande
and spliffy w/white widow in other
punter a appears
sk : oh punter a....its you...how are ya, mah friend???
punter a : hi ya man, well ya see mah cat died, mah mother married a prince
in arabia, i got mah ph fucken d at last, and mah brother billy, well, he...
Suddenly punter b turns up
punter b : hey hey ess kay....!
now the painfull part, my groons
does sk cut off punter a and rudely interrupt his story
or does he ignore punter b
who he hasnt seen for 15 years
and who once helped him escape from a turkish jail...?
what i have tended to do is to try to accomodate em both
and usually both have gone off in a huffy
thinkin ole sk is one rude druid
but
i say
but
how many other people hit a city
and thenne suddenly
runne into 27 olde pals at once?
same as now
should i bee home opening the pressies with yon kiddiwinks
OAR
should i be reminiscing here wid chew
my devotee
my favoured one
my true love
my bloggy-woggy-all-in-a-foggy
also elektra and miranda still sleeping in their room
they were up late
wrapping and rapping
coming in my room every time
i was nearly in the arms of morpheus
(read asleep ED)
every time i nearly dropped off...
knock knock
barge inne
(in swedish accent)
just wondering how early you want yer presents, daddy
ITS A FUCKIN MOOT POINT, MAH LIL DAUGHTERS
COS I GET UP AT 6 EVERY DAY
AND YE SLEEPE TILL 11
SO WHY ASK ME THAT NOW???
but i stay silent...
you see....loyalties
and the loyalties between the big twins
and the little twins
here daddy out in the deepe water, where the sharkeys are...!!??
no daddy, you promised youd help us build a sand castle
then
groovy friend of sk whos observin the scene
hey sk me and some friends gonna blow this bone
grab a coffeee
and talk about ye olde art
wanna join us...?
so you see it could bee a 3 way split
or a 4 way street
or even
a penta gone
any how
as i write this
xmas is explding all over austrayliah
"you mean this is all i got?"
"oh how super...an ironing board..!"
"gee thanks kids...a pair of brown socks"
"thats wunderful oscar...i can always use another tea cosy"
"gladys, ta love.....a monogrammed hanky...with yer exs initials..!"
and so on
fill in yer own chrissie gags
ya lazy buggers
why expect me to provide
all the mirth
and
merri
ment
?
any way
i spose i should mosey over chez k
see what satan brought the kids..
see if the raindear manure
will wash outta the rugs
see if my mistletoe has been kissed under
see if my christmas puddy is full o goode cheere
see if the 100 degree heat has melted my santa snow
etc
etc
(insert own xmas cliche here)
(tired of that device, sk ED)
(who is ED sk?)
any way
you gluttonous fiendss
you greedy little *@^%ers
thats it
will bring speshal christmasse nite report
HO HO HO
Saturday, December 24, 2005
stingrays and sultana cake
lovely xmas bash was had
swimming at a fabbo eastern suburbs harbour beachey
sk has too much cakey
sees a stingray
sees a hole in shark net
gets sore throat from schnorkel
but very nice do
amazing to walk home thru quietened
darkened suburbs
xmas lites and shadows
lovely night breeze
voices inside houses
i was thinking
about so many other
xmasses i have had
in canberra w/ dry heat and the smell of pines
in sweden ye olde trad xmas w/ snow and etcs
in wollongong
the incredible din of cicadas in the trees
in the us
w/ snow and etcs
oh come now sk
dont get all nostalgic now
nostalgia ill becomes ya
you olde rebelle
so lets leave all that behind
i am happy here and now
house sitting
somewhere in bondi
the twillies bustle round here and there
speakin' their nordik jive lingo
sounding impossibly fast
tomorrow is out there waiting
we are heaved forward by time
space squeezes us
life plagues us
human beans run about in a frenzy
and nothing else on this planet
is the slightest bit interested
in our acheivements
and our bullshit
the waves keep coming
the flies keep flying
the bats go thru the summer nite air
the cockroaches are a'rustlin'
the ants are marching
the stars are shining on brightly
whales are out there in the sea
swimming, making love
and avoiding nassssty jappy harpoons
only in this way does man intrude
the bears dont care about parishilton, baybee
the mosquitoes and the moon
are oblivious to tomcruisebradpity
the mountains probably aint gonna come to you
so look at things from a non human perspective
once in a while, my pests
try to drop your man o centric lenses
and dig the vegetal scene
watch the ants
hug a fucking tree
save the life of a stranded jellyfish
or support a collapsing star
do right
use your head
get together
bake some bread
its xmas
its time to take stocke
time to be peaceful
forgive yourself, little baby
let it all go
tonite be happy for a while
set a turkey free
give someone you love
something nice
thats right
see....?
its easy
now
relax
2
3
4
relax
2
3
....oh, forget it
go to a party
one of those amazin' partees
you gonna remember yer whole life
drink
smoke
eat
snort
drop
love
wake
uh oh
achey achey
oh no
sore tummy
oooh whats that nasssty feelin'?
the wrath of grapes...
a flashbacke....?
a hangover?
a high temp?
manne
you dont look so goode
pace yerself
you gotta still get thru tomorrah
leave out some brandy for santa
wriggle up a chimney
and learn to control a team o flyin fuckin reindear
maybe you bit off too much this time. sk
maybe just a quiet knight inne
maybe just a quick cuppa tea
and its curtains....
drive carefully
fly safely
fade away and radiate
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
from
me
swimming at a fabbo eastern suburbs harbour beachey
sk has too much cakey
sees a stingray
sees a hole in shark net
gets sore throat from schnorkel
but very nice do
amazing to walk home thru quietened
darkened suburbs
xmas lites and shadows
lovely night breeze
voices inside houses
i was thinking
about so many other
xmasses i have had
in canberra w/ dry heat and the smell of pines
in sweden ye olde trad xmas w/ snow and etcs
in wollongong
the incredible din of cicadas in the trees
in the us
w/ snow and etcs
oh come now sk
dont get all nostalgic now
nostalgia ill becomes ya
you olde rebelle
so lets leave all that behind
i am happy here and now
house sitting
somewhere in bondi
the twillies bustle round here and there
speakin' their nordik jive lingo
sounding impossibly fast
tomorrow is out there waiting
we are heaved forward by time
space squeezes us
life plagues us
human beans run about in a frenzy
and nothing else on this planet
is the slightest bit interested
in our acheivements
and our bullshit
the waves keep coming
the flies keep flying
the bats go thru the summer nite air
the cockroaches are a'rustlin'
the ants are marching
the stars are shining on brightly
whales are out there in the sea
swimming, making love
and avoiding nassssty jappy harpoons
only in this way does man intrude
the bears dont care about parishilton, baybee
the mosquitoes and the moon
are oblivious to tomcruisebradpity
the mountains probably aint gonna come to you
so look at things from a non human perspective
once in a while, my pests
try to drop your man o centric lenses
and dig the vegetal scene
watch the ants
hug a fucking tree
save the life of a stranded jellyfish
or support a collapsing star
do right
use your head
get together
bake some bread
its xmas
its time to take stocke
time to be peaceful
forgive yourself, little baby
let it all go
tonite be happy for a while
set a turkey free
give someone you love
something nice
thats right
see....?
its easy
now
relax
2
3
4
relax
2
3
....oh, forget it
go to a party
one of those amazin' partees
you gonna remember yer whole life
drink
smoke
eat
snort
drop
love
wake
uh oh
achey achey
oh no
sore tummy
oooh whats that nasssty feelin'?
the wrath of grapes...
a flashbacke....?
a hangover?
a high temp?
manne
you dont look so goode
pace yerself
you gotta still get thru tomorrah
leave out some brandy for santa
wriggle up a chimney
and learn to control a team o flyin fuckin reindear
maybe you bit off too much this time. sk
maybe just a quiet knight inne
maybe just a quick cuppa tea
and its curtains....
drive carefully
fly safely
fade away and radiate
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
from
me
XXXmas eve, the spirit of tinsel
jesus
i hate it when that happens
everything happening twice
im sorry for the inconvenience
just woke up
weird day out there
heavy leaden sky
already v. hot
already v. muggy
the kinda day the world could end
must drag mah self to pool
must do mah laps
must wake up
very quiet here in c and a-ms flattie
twillies asleep in their room
the pools gonna have a load of johnny-come-latelys there
i swim every day of the year
even when the water gets down to 13 c
where are all those summer swimmers then
where are all those bronzed turkees
when sk is swimmin thru the freezin' brine...?
so you can see
how begrudgingly i share mah poole w/ these fooles
they swim fast in the slow lane
the swim slow in the fast lane
they clog up the sauna
and they lie around roastin their flesh
in an off- puttin' way
still
its better than chlorine
nassty chlorine, my pets
nassty
ok
i should gette going
im just procrastinatin' now
why procrastinate now...?
when you could do it tomorrow...
im sure i'll be back later
with part 2
it seems im up to 2 bloggs a day
not countin false starts
i guess i'll catch ya thenne...
sk
i hate it when that happens
everything happening twice
im sorry for the inconvenience
just woke up
weird day out there
heavy leaden sky
already v. hot
already v. muggy
the kinda day the world could end
must drag mah self to pool
must do mah laps
must wake up
very quiet here in c and a-ms flattie
twillies asleep in their room
the pools gonna have a load of johnny-come-latelys there
i swim every day of the year
even when the water gets down to 13 c
where are all those summer swimmers then
where are all those bronzed turkees
when sk is swimmin thru the freezin' brine...?
so you can see
how begrudgingly i share mah poole w/ these fooles
they swim fast in the slow lane
the swim slow in the fast lane
they clog up the sauna
and they lie around roastin their flesh
in an off- puttin' way
still
its better than chlorine
nassty chlorine, my pets
nassty
ok
i should gette going
im just procrastinatin' now
why procrastinate now...?
when you could do it tomorrow...
im sure i'll be back later
with part 2
it seems im up to 2 bloggs a day
not countin false starts
i guess i'll catch ya thenne...
sk
Friday, December 23, 2005
my head is a nightclub, with tables and wine
more thoughts before i retire for the day
sound of drunken "kids" in the distance
laughter, screaming
theyre just having fun
but what is fun
did fun exist 200 years ago
fun is used to justify anything
aw cmon ...we were just havin' fun
let the "kids" have some fun
all i wanna do is have some fun
if sheryl crow married russell crow.....
but im raven on
childs xmas in new south wales
my dad drove me and my mum out
of wollongong
to albion park rail
where there was a forlorn church
surrounded by graves
every xmas they had a little nativity scene
my mum told my dad off
for whistling a xmas carol
should have more respect
our car had indicators that were
these little flaps that lifted out
and blinked
even then
i was plotting
all this
ha!
i used every shred of whatever i could get
to put this all together for ya
my dad told me all he used to get for xmas
in london
was a piece of fruit
i was outraged
but dad, didnt they want you to have fun...?
we didnt have fun back then son
what did yer have daddyo?
we had war
thats where you had yer funne back then
werent you frightened dad ?
i was , son
which was worse dad...the first
or the second world war...?
well, son, they say the first
was the worst...
what was they fighting over, mah daddy o?
i dunno...thatss just the way it was
ymean ya dont know what the first world freakin' war was about?
nope, still dont...
do you?
didja know that in certain parts of medi evil france
you could get roasted ah live
dependin' on how you happen'd
to define the trinity
(a fuckin ineffable concept)
people
the critics are having us on
i saw the winner of archibald prize twice now
(thats an ozzie portrait comp, for you foriegnerss)
and i tell ya
its ah tro shus
serious olde emperors clothes number going on
i dare you to say this painting is tripe
so ole sk cruises round yon gallery
puts it to the test
approaches ye olde family
who are standin' round
and gawking at this fuckin monstrosity in brown
and i says
travesty of justice
cmon people
what do ya really reckon
and the whole fam
burst into vitriolic bile
spewed forth their spleen
on this terrible picture
that won a big prizey
they hated it
and it only needed a little goading
from your humble protagonist
y'see
the critics job
is to foist a dodgy iffy
olde piece of tripe on ya
and then explain to ya
why ya should love it
an' then you try to
cos aftah all,
theyre a critic
they can spell juxtaposed
and who wants to be a phuckin' philistine
in an arte gallerie,
who cares
its nearly xmas out there
remember xmas down here is warm
its gonna be 100 degrees tomorrow
imagine the gallons of beer
slurpin down them sunburnt throats
imagine the gurlss on yonder beachie
topless and g stringed
imagine the lifesavers
imagine the ice cream sellers
imagine the sea gulls
the dilapidated pigeons
the tramps among the brazilian coke deelahs
the night markets
the massage parlours
the black waves rollin' in
imagine me
sittin' up in c and a-ms flat
house sittin'
alone
its very quiet
soft breezes
10 26 at nite
attitude adjusted
writing to you like an olde friend
cos i miss ya
i remember ya
and one day
we
will
spend
xmas
together
sound of drunken "kids" in the distance
laughter, screaming
theyre just having fun
but what is fun
did fun exist 200 years ago
fun is used to justify anything
aw cmon ...we were just havin' fun
let the "kids" have some fun
all i wanna do is have some fun
if sheryl crow married russell crow.....
but im raven on
childs xmas in new south wales
my dad drove me and my mum out
of wollongong
to albion park rail
where there was a forlorn church
surrounded by graves
every xmas they had a little nativity scene
my mum told my dad off
for whistling a xmas carol
should have more respect
our car had indicators that were
these little flaps that lifted out
and blinked
even then
i was plotting
all this
ha!
i used every shred of whatever i could get
to put this all together for ya
my dad told me all he used to get for xmas
in london
was a piece of fruit
i was outraged
but dad, didnt they want you to have fun...?
we didnt have fun back then son
what did yer have daddyo?
we had war
thats where you had yer funne back then
werent you frightened dad ?
i was , son
which was worse dad...the first
or the second world war...?
well, son, they say the first
was the worst...
what was they fighting over, mah daddy o?
i dunno...thatss just the way it was
ymean ya dont know what the first world freakin' war was about?
nope, still dont...
do you?
didja know that in certain parts of medi evil france
you could get roasted ah live
dependin' on how you happen'd
to define the trinity
(a fuckin ineffable concept)
people
the critics are having us on
i saw the winner of archibald prize twice now
(thats an ozzie portrait comp, for you foriegnerss)
and i tell ya
its ah tro shus
serious olde emperors clothes number going on
i dare you to say this painting is tripe
so ole sk cruises round yon gallery
puts it to the test
approaches ye olde family
who are standin' round
and gawking at this fuckin monstrosity in brown
and i says
travesty of justice
cmon people
what do ya really reckon
and the whole fam
burst into vitriolic bile
spewed forth their spleen
on this terrible picture
that won a big prizey
they hated it
and it only needed a little goading
from your humble protagonist
y'see
the critics job
is to foist a dodgy iffy
olde piece of tripe on ya
and then explain to ya
why ya should love it
an' then you try to
cos aftah all,
theyre a critic
they can spell juxtaposed
and who wants to be a phuckin' philistine
in an arte gallerie,
who cares
its nearly xmas out there
remember xmas down here is warm
its gonna be 100 degrees tomorrow
imagine the gallons of beer
slurpin down them sunburnt throats
imagine the gurlss on yonder beachie
topless and g stringed
imagine the lifesavers
imagine the ice cream sellers
imagine the sea gulls
the dilapidated pigeons
the tramps among the brazilian coke deelahs
the night markets
the massage parlours
the black waves rollin' in
imagine me
sittin' up in c and a-ms flat
house sittin'
alone
its very quiet
soft breezes
10 26 at nite
attitude adjusted
writing to you like an olde friend
cos i miss ya
i remember ya
and one day
we
will
spend
xmas
together
on the feast of steven:deep crisp evens
seasons gratings
these are the facts
this is the truth
tho i guess you'd call some of this "lies"
especially if you were a "straight"
especially if you werent in on the joke
especially if it was your life that had been appropriated
especially if the conspiracy had taken yer fender tele
and given yer back an assault rifle
especially if youd done the hard yards
answered the big questions
and made some heavy changes
i know it all looks easy to ya
play a little basse
write a little bloggy
do a little beach combing
a bitta pranayama
sum crawl and breast stroke
but at a much deeper level
i am waging this war
you know who are the foe!
the foe may even be reading these very words right now
the foe may not even be a "straight"
its no surprise things are deterioatin'
i warned ya 20 odd years of grunt ago
remember earthed?
yeah
well it all came true
im still out here fightin' tho
dismantling the "straights" apparati
wherever the fuck they maybe
or whoever the fuck they may bee..
i gotta song for em
i gotta pome for em
i gotta fookin solution for em
let them bmws rust
abandon those ivory towers
with ocean glimpses and ensuite
throw down yer suits
give up yer exercise bikes
hurl away in disgust the corpse you be nibblin' on
put everything to do with yer "straight" job
in one file and hit delete
now
get yer alcohol
use yer beer to wash yer hair
or make soup
do not drink
give yer red wine to uncle roger and aunty flo
theyll appreciate a good drop
plus they love to get pissed
get yer spirits
and use em to make tinctures of marijuwahna with
now take all your aftershave
and dispose of it thoughtfully
sorry ladies
give the perfume to st vinnies
its hiding all yer ferrymones
and bouys
you dont have to put all that make up on
or defrizz yer hair
an take those tights off
its xmas, fer gods sake
2006 is coming fast
so learn to make handy things
out of olde sheets of asbestos
found lying in the roof
or practice bullfighting
with the naybores 4 wheel drive
impress yer friendss with renditions from the
sk song book
or the idiots guide to sk
currently # 3
on nth bondi charts
or make xmas decorations from the clouds
and light it up with yer smile
and then fill it with a little goode cheere
look
i have this one already prepared
this is hows yours should be
by the time you get finished
remember not too late too send sk xmas gift
or wait around a scoop up those post xmas barginns
whatever
as if i give a flying fucking fuck
im cool with jesus
he and i both know it aint his birthday on sunday no how
they co opted an olde pagan fuckin hol, my friendss
jesus was the 13 of sept or something
give me a brake
i honour that man every day of the year
and i think of him always
yet seldom resmble him at all
jesus aint about religion
jesus aint about this side n that side
jesus aint about do this n don do that
jesus is take it easy
jesus is its ok
jesus is it happens to all of us
dont blame churches on him
dont blame archbishops and steeples
or fuckin inquisitions
or fuck ing witch hunts!!!
or latin blah blah blahs
he never had anything to do with that
sk aint no member of nobodies flock
but if ya read the new testa mento desquidado
if you do actually read it
(AN YA KNOW WHAT?
i know some of ya haver never read it....)
you have to come away thinking
that if jesus was the lead singer
of (insert name of fave groop here)
they could definitely sell out newt town
quite comfortably
for quite a few nights
cos the man had a way with language
and he had charisma....jesus
he defined charisma
all charisma is but a pale imitation of his own
on every level
one of the goode guys
for sure
a bohemian to boot
but whos counting?
so
celebrate
go wilde
oscillate wildly
party on dudes
have a simply splendid get together
or whatever you may call it
im gonna have a body surf
and ruminate on
you know who
these are the facts
this is the truth
tho i guess you'd call some of this "lies"
especially if you were a "straight"
especially if you werent in on the joke
especially if it was your life that had been appropriated
especially if the conspiracy had taken yer fender tele
and given yer back an assault rifle
especially if youd done the hard yards
answered the big questions
and made some heavy changes
i know it all looks easy to ya
play a little basse
write a little bloggy
do a little beach combing
a bitta pranayama
sum crawl and breast stroke
but at a much deeper level
i am waging this war
you know who are the foe!
the foe may even be reading these very words right now
the foe may not even be a "straight"
its no surprise things are deterioatin'
i warned ya 20 odd years of grunt ago
remember earthed?
yeah
well it all came true
im still out here fightin' tho
dismantling the "straights" apparati
wherever the fuck they maybe
or whoever the fuck they may bee..
i gotta song for em
i gotta pome for em
i gotta fookin solution for em
let them bmws rust
abandon those ivory towers
with ocean glimpses and ensuite
throw down yer suits
give up yer exercise bikes
hurl away in disgust the corpse you be nibblin' on
put everything to do with yer "straight" job
in one file and hit delete
now
get yer alcohol
use yer beer to wash yer hair
or make soup
do not drink
give yer red wine to uncle roger and aunty flo
theyll appreciate a good drop
plus they love to get pissed
get yer spirits
and use em to make tinctures of marijuwahna with
now take all your aftershave
and dispose of it thoughtfully
sorry ladies
give the perfume to st vinnies
its hiding all yer ferrymones
and bouys
you dont have to put all that make up on
or defrizz yer hair
an take those tights off
its xmas, fer gods sake
2006 is coming fast
so learn to make handy things
out of olde sheets of asbestos
found lying in the roof
or practice bullfighting
with the naybores 4 wheel drive
impress yer friendss with renditions from the
sk song book
or the idiots guide to sk
currently # 3
on nth bondi charts
or make xmas decorations from the clouds
and light it up with yer smile
and then fill it with a little goode cheere
look
i have this one already prepared
this is hows yours should be
by the time you get finished
remember not too late too send sk xmas gift
or wait around a scoop up those post xmas barginns
whatever
as if i give a flying fucking fuck
im cool with jesus
he and i both know it aint his birthday on sunday no how
they co opted an olde pagan fuckin hol, my friendss
jesus was the 13 of sept or something
give me a brake
i honour that man every day of the year
and i think of him always
yet seldom resmble him at all
jesus aint about religion
jesus aint about this side n that side
jesus aint about do this n don do that
jesus is take it easy
jesus is its ok
jesus is it happens to all of us
dont blame churches on him
dont blame archbishops and steeples
or fuckin inquisitions
or fuck ing witch hunts!!!
or latin blah blah blahs
he never had anything to do with that
sk aint no member of nobodies flock
but if ya read the new testa mento desquidado
if you do actually read it
(AN YA KNOW WHAT?
i know some of ya haver never read it....)
you have to come away thinking
that if jesus was the lead singer
of (insert name of fave groop here)
they could definitely sell out newt town
quite comfortably
for quite a few nights
cos the man had a way with language
and he had charisma....jesus
he defined charisma
all charisma is but a pale imitation of his own
on every level
one of the goode guys
for sure
a bohemian to boot
but whos counting?
so
celebrate
go wilde
oscillate wildly
party on dudes
have a simply splendid get together
or whatever you may call it
im gonna have a body surf
and ruminate on
you know who
Thursday, December 22, 2005
stardate 221205 captains supplementary log
have pushed wrong button again
have entered universe of the "straights"
have had security compromised
all i have to give is the serial number o' mah basse
paisley shirtes confiscated
earrings beaten into cufflinks
captain requires crew to be seated
this could be bumpy
flotilla of beer gutted record execs(B.G.R.E.s)
coverging
playing elton john at high volume
inducing panic in bohemian crew
journalistic scum penetrating the shield
grovelling bakebean and bevvy pommy journo
sending badde review our way
big important yankee CE fuckin O
ordring us to have a fuckin nothah hitte
whole world gone madde
now sk
jettison the obvious
ah.....
thats it...!
you amazingly well preserved olde astranewt
youve done it again
uninvited like the fershlugginer clouds
a mastahpeece, thats fer shore
enuff wi' tha badde spellling
time for this olde galaktic hippy
to hit the outer limits within
voyage interieur
sleeeep
sssshhhhh
the olde rocker has already left
the billding
have entered universe of the "straights"
have had security compromised
all i have to give is the serial number o' mah basse
paisley shirtes confiscated
earrings beaten into cufflinks
captain requires crew to be seated
this could be bumpy
flotilla of beer gutted record execs(B.G.R.E.s)
coverging
playing elton john at high volume
inducing panic in bohemian crew
journalistic scum penetrating the shield
grovelling bakebean and bevvy pommy journo
sending badde review our way
big important yankee CE fuckin O
ordring us to have a fuckin nothah hitte
whole world gone madde
now sk
jettison the obvious
ah.....
thats it...!
you amazingly well preserved olde astranewt
youve done it again
uninvited like the fershlugginer clouds
a mastahpeece, thats fer shore
enuff wi' tha badde spellling
time for this olde galaktic hippy
to hit the outer limits within
voyage interieur
sleeeep
sssshhhhh
the olde rocker has already left
the billding
love is the shadow that darkens the wine
meanwhile
in a reality not far from here
our humble hero sk
and his boyish sidekick, jc
are planning their next attack upon showbiz
and its cast of imbeciles and pigs
jc is a small elfin man with dark hair and a sly grin
sk is tanned with a white beardy
jc (in heavy transatlantic accent)
so, olde wrocker, time to launch our next sonic assault
sk(an awful cross between aussie bricklayer and pommie twit)
not so fast olde pal....so many cretins left unmoved
despite our knockout manifesto and our gangbustin' reviews
jc
here are 2 new cds full of esoteric guitars
full of obscure basses
full of distant plaintiff pianos
full of drum loops that will blow down the kingdom of the "straights"
sk
eh, whats that about fuckin dire straits?
jc
tis true, the sonic wars have taken a toll on thy hearing
meanwhile
some where in an office
in hollywood
in paris
in london
in sydney
the "straights" are getting worried
fat evil record exec w/beeer gut + w/gold chain (hes a cancer):
sbeen a long time since izzydore launch that last sonic assault, henchmen
i dont know if i can handle another cd of ambiguous lyrics and nonobvious music
i can feel it comin in the air, if not tonite, then soon
(small nasty a+r man in suity and gelled hare):
but, god lord, you dont mean......
exec:
yes boys, i dunno if the remaining big 3 can take another shocke like that...
those songs....they were so goddamn mellifluous
they were nauseatingly vague
they were stultifyingly amorphous
goddamm it!!
i want those 2
DEAD OR ALIVE
LATER ACROSS TOWN
SCENE INSIDE DUNGEON
sk and jc are being mercilessly subjected to
abbyssmal tripe via hard wired into brain speakers
theyre blasting fuckin' (insert name of band here)
direct into sks frontal cortexian lobes
jc
jesus, sk cannae take that music in such doses, you'll frie
his freakin brains!!
fat evil smalmy record exec w/key to vip bathroom + special parking spot:
ha ha this is the end of this dynamic duo...
izzydoor will not be back to plague the mightee konglomerats
nor will their winsome fair set people free from the shackles of the gossip rags
from enthrallment with empty celebrity
ignoring the great achievements of man
we will focus the proletariat
on meateating
on hounding their celebrities
on sports
on cigarettes
on booze
on preskription fuckin drugs baybee
here take yer bleatin' valium, ya little sucker...
and then the big 3 'll become the big 2
and then....
guess what.....?
yes, thats right, people
the bigge 1
THE BIG ONE
READ AS
THE ONLY ONE
and then we'll eliminate all that messy variety y'all
got now
and you'll have to listen to (insert name of pea brains here)
and (insert name of schmaltzy gurly here)
and(insert name of boozy gruff old shouter here)
and (insert name of pale pommy indy fops here)
and.....
oh mi god
sk and jc have escaped during mah mono log
jesus
perhaps the world aint seen the last of izzydaur aftah all...
SCENE KH LUXURY MOBILE REC UNIT
SOMEWHERE IN BAHAMAS)
sk
pass me another pina colada jc
and fire that sucker up
i feel an iconoclastic monster abrewin' in my head....
(HUSKY VOICEOVER MANNE)
yes, thats right, folks
wherever ever
you find true rock
and true roll
and the need for
a coupla dudes with neat riffs
and ye olde koole lyrics
there yondah shall ye find
IZZYDOOR # 2
coming soon
and this time
its personal!!!
in a reality not far from here
our humble hero sk
and his boyish sidekick, jc
are planning their next attack upon showbiz
and its cast of imbeciles and pigs
jc is a small elfin man with dark hair and a sly grin
sk is tanned with a white beardy
jc (in heavy transatlantic accent)
so, olde wrocker, time to launch our next sonic assault
sk(an awful cross between aussie bricklayer and pommie twit)
not so fast olde pal....so many cretins left unmoved
despite our knockout manifesto and our gangbustin' reviews
jc
here are 2 new cds full of esoteric guitars
full of obscure basses
full of distant plaintiff pianos
full of drum loops that will blow down the kingdom of the "straights"
sk
eh, whats that about fuckin dire straits?
jc
tis true, the sonic wars have taken a toll on thy hearing
meanwhile
some where in an office
in hollywood
in paris
in london
in sydney
the "straights" are getting worried
fat evil record exec w/beeer gut + w/gold chain (hes a cancer):
sbeen a long time since izzydore launch that last sonic assault, henchmen
i dont know if i can handle another cd of ambiguous lyrics and nonobvious music
i can feel it comin in the air, if not tonite, then soon
(small nasty a+r man in suity and gelled hare):
but, god lord, you dont mean......
exec:
yes boys, i dunno if the remaining big 3 can take another shocke like that...
those songs....they were so goddamn mellifluous
they were nauseatingly vague
they were stultifyingly amorphous
goddamm it!!
i want those 2
DEAD OR ALIVE
LATER ACROSS TOWN
SCENE INSIDE DUNGEON
sk and jc are being mercilessly subjected to
abbyssmal tripe via hard wired into brain speakers
theyre blasting fuckin' (insert name of band here)
direct into sks frontal cortexian lobes
jc
jesus, sk cannae take that music in such doses, you'll frie
his freakin brains!!
fat evil smalmy record exec w/key to vip bathroom + special parking spot:
ha ha this is the end of this dynamic duo...
izzydoor will not be back to plague the mightee konglomerats
nor will their winsome fair set people free from the shackles of the gossip rags
from enthrallment with empty celebrity
ignoring the great achievements of man
we will focus the proletariat
on meateating
on hounding their celebrities
on sports
on cigarettes
on booze
on preskription fuckin drugs baybee
here take yer bleatin' valium, ya little sucker...
and then the big 3 'll become the big 2
and then....
guess what.....?
yes, thats right, people
the bigge 1
THE BIG ONE
READ AS
THE ONLY ONE
and then we'll eliminate all that messy variety y'all
got now
and you'll have to listen to (insert name of pea brains here)
and (insert name of schmaltzy gurly here)
and(insert name of boozy gruff old shouter here)
and (insert name of pale pommy indy fops here)
and.....
oh mi god
sk and jc have escaped during mah mono log
jesus
perhaps the world aint seen the last of izzydaur aftah all...
SCENE KH LUXURY MOBILE REC UNIT
SOMEWHERE IN BAHAMAS)
sk
pass me another pina colada jc
and fire that sucker up
i feel an iconoclastic monster abrewin' in my head....
(HUSKY VOICEOVER MANNE)
yes, thats right, folks
wherever ever
you find true rock
and true roll
and the need for
a coupla dudes with neat riffs
and ye olde koole lyrics
there yondah shall ye find
IZZYDOOR # 2
coming soon
and this time
its personal!!!
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
bohemian rupture
wow
a beautiful day here
in ye olde bondi beach
oh the soft and warm water in the sea pool
oh the light and caressing zephyrs
which did play round your humble heros face
as he was lost in a trance
sucking up the chi
taking a million giga bytes of prana on board
with every breath i took
with every move i made
oh the surfers weaving dissolving patterns in the waves, baybee
pretty gurls and their dads
everything summer
the last day o school
evie and aurora got six weeks off
time to chill down by the sea
(cmon sk, we know youre just setting us up with all this pretty talk,
just to say sumpthin' snide and cynical, you know,
the way ya juxtapose those 2 opposites,
its yer freakin trademark)
no fiendss
no nasstyness today
well maybe a little
just a little gentle nasssstyness....
i see in my comments section
a very considerate note from
someone
saying dear steve you know i love you
(well really, i mean, like, who doesnt?)
but please drop the "sk" thang
but wait a while to do it or i'll feeel self conscious...
thanks for yer concern
thanks for yer sweet love
thanks for tryin to put me straight
but sk is my registered copyrighted altar ego
hes me as manifested on yer screen, me little darlin'
itd be like asking micky jagger to lose the lips logo
itd be like asking texas to lose its lone star
itd be like asking (insert yer own example here)
so sorry
but that will knot become part of this bloggys forthcoming
policy
well sk
you handled that quite diplomatically, i thought
(but then, i would, wouldnt i?)
others say oh sk
doo thisss
do thatttt
beee like thissss for mee.....
careful what ya wish for,small ones
cos imagine if ole sks blogg looked like this.
Good morning, my readers
another spiffing day in bondi, and as its nearing
that time of the year, let me take this opportunity
to wish all my friends, all over the world
a lovely christmas
and a very happy new year
full of good things
for you and for yours
from my desk
your friend
steven
xxxxx
no hobbits
you cant change sk
im too olde and ugly to change my ways
im gonna keep on the way i am
im gonna go on being a fuckin genius
COZ SOMEONE HAS TO !!
im gonna go on
with mah little jokes
with mah little literay devices
with mah little groop
and im gonna be on the side of
greek mythology
hindu gods of love
mariju etc wahna
yoga
meddi tashun
swimmy swimmy in the olde ocean
paintin
poetry
actin'
bringin' uppe mah kidss to bee goode bohemian gurls
speakin' sk speak
revilin' the weak the lame and the grotesque
imbeciles that showbiz thrusts down yer throatie
i defend the right of all men and wimmen
to smoke ganja, listen to space rock
and commune with mother nature
to buy products from high times magazines
(speshally the electronic kaleidoscope goggle things)
to wear paisley shirts
to show yer solidarity wiv the sixties
and the hippies
to not read the fuckin' gossip rags
people, theyre fuckin killing ya!
any how
thatss mee
don try an change me, sister
don try an make mee like you , brother
for i am sk
and no other
thatss why you love me
isnt it
?
a beautiful day here
in ye olde bondi beach
oh the soft and warm water in the sea pool
oh the light and caressing zephyrs
which did play round your humble heros face
as he was lost in a trance
sucking up the chi
taking a million giga bytes of prana on board
with every breath i took
with every move i made
oh the surfers weaving dissolving patterns in the waves, baybee
pretty gurls and their dads
everything summer
the last day o school
evie and aurora got six weeks off
time to chill down by the sea
(cmon sk, we know youre just setting us up with all this pretty talk,
just to say sumpthin' snide and cynical, you know,
the way ya juxtapose those 2 opposites,
its yer freakin trademark)
no fiendss
no nasstyness today
well maybe a little
just a little gentle nasssstyness....
i see in my comments section
a very considerate note from
someone
saying dear steve you know i love you
(well really, i mean, like, who doesnt?)
but please drop the "sk" thang
but wait a while to do it or i'll feeel self conscious...
thanks for yer concern
thanks for yer sweet love
thanks for tryin to put me straight
but sk is my registered copyrighted altar ego
hes me as manifested on yer screen, me little darlin'
itd be like asking micky jagger to lose the lips logo
itd be like asking texas to lose its lone star
itd be like asking (insert yer own example here)
so sorry
but that will knot become part of this bloggys forthcoming
policy
well sk
you handled that quite diplomatically, i thought
(but then, i would, wouldnt i?)
others say oh sk
doo thisss
do thatttt
beee like thissss for mee.....
careful what ya wish for,small ones
cos imagine if ole sks blogg looked like this.
Good morning, my readers
another spiffing day in bondi, and as its nearing
that time of the year, let me take this opportunity
to wish all my friends, all over the world
a lovely christmas
and a very happy new year
full of good things
for you and for yours
from my desk
your friend
steven
xxxxx
no hobbits
you cant change sk
im too olde and ugly to change my ways
im gonna keep on the way i am
im gonna go on being a fuckin genius
COZ SOMEONE HAS TO !!
im gonna go on
with mah little jokes
with mah little literay devices
with mah little groop
and im gonna be on the side of
greek mythology
hindu gods of love
mariju etc wahna
yoga
meddi tashun
swimmy swimmy in the olde ocean
paintin
poetry
actin'
bringin' uppe mah kidss to bee goode bohemian gurls
speakin' sk speak
revilin' the weak the lame and the grotesque
imbeciles that showbiz thrusts down yer throatie
i defend the right of all men and wimmen
to smoke ganja, listen to space rock
and commune with mother nature
to buy products from high times magazines
(speshally the electronic kaleidoscope goggle things)
to wear paisley shirts
to show yer solidarity wiv the sixties
and the hippies
to not read the fuckin' gossip rags
people, theyre fuckin killing ya!
any how
thatss mee
don try an change me, sister
don try an make mee like you , brother
for i am sk
and no other
thatss why you love me
isnt it
?
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
sk, a dyslexic mindreader
greetings
ladies and gentlemen
have you been reading the stats
have ya heard the calls of the blog-advertisers
as they hound me day and knight
temptin' me with loookrahtive offahs, my tiny birdies
oh please sk, with you pie sliced thus
and your daily blah blahs now reaching a mean average rainfall...
puh lease
i must admit
when i started yon bloggy
i was, let us say, perhaps just a little
tempted by the prospect
of having a diary to sell
but
and any fool can see
even you
that seeing yonder goode blogge is free
gratis
complimentary
that no fool on erf
no
not even you
would pay good munny
for a previously free
and downloadable item
anyway where was i
interesting visit from other members of guilty trippe
saying they had had just a quarter
and demanding my ye olde basse
which ole sk not so keene to part with it
oh sk
yer grammars all shot
you tried to go all populist and hippo
but yer grammar and yer spellin are suffring, olde human bean
how is this slangslingin hipster commensurate
with yer image
as the re-nay-sonce manne, you olde crim
how do we fuckin well reconcile this tanned olde beachcomber
droppin' his gees all over the plaice
with the pale consumptive
of yore
who always dotted his peas
and minded his queues
oh sk
yer mixin fuckin metaphores
you olde linguistic freake
you playful preposition dropper
you melder of the queens inglish into sk speak
and i see in my comments section
that yall adoptin sk speak
so kay
my tiny fishes
so kay
oh come let uss redraw him
its perfectly natural to use sk speak
espesh among the "straights"
you know the upptite cats
the ones with jobs workin for the manne
keepin your humble hero wrapped up in red tape
and waterbills
blaming me for the weather
holdin me accountable for mah wilde ways
for makin mariju fuckin wahna illegal
when it should be the boooze which is illegal, BAYBEE
if it has to either of em
theyre fuckin happy to send ya to war
but will nae let ya smoke mother nature
in case (STILL NO EVIDENCE BAYBEE)
in case
its bad for ya
well mr sk, we KNOW wars badde for ya
so kiss yer ass goodbye
HOWEVER
we aint sure (SURE!!)
that the ole potski is or aint
SO
we prohibiting it for yer own fuckin goode, boyo
but what about the receptors in mah brain
the one that will never switch on without ye olde THC
forget it sk
yer not allowed to smoke ye olde weedie
and paint yer songs
and choreograph yer poems
and sculpt yer abs
and penetrate the mysteries
of art
life
death
and
all
the
other
bullshit
you carry on with
so there you go
i am the monster you have created
i am sk
i am a blogger
i am a bohemian loyalist
and i have the earrings and drugs to prove it
i am a member of the choich
who have given up much rock
so you cood all bee free
dont try and holde me down
you eville govamence
i will not succumb
you will know me by the tail of the duds
i am sk
i have no capitals
i am unborn
yet manifest
i am....
uh oh
i gotta doo my xmas shopping
BAH HUMBUG BAYBEE!!!!
ladies and gentlemen
have you been reading the stats
have ya heard the calls of the blog-advertisers
as they hound me day and knight
temptin' me with loookrahtive offahs, my tiny birdies
oh please sk, with you pie sliced thus
and your daily blah blahs now reaching a mean average rainfall...
puh lease
i must admit
when i started yon bloggy
i was, let us say, perhaps just a little
tempted by the prospect
of having a diary to sell
but
and any fool can see
even you
that seeing yonder goode blogge is free
gratis
complimentary
that no fool on erf
no
not even you
would pay good munny
for a previously free
and downloadable item
anyway where was i
interesting visit from other members of guilty trippe
saying they had had just a quarter
and demanding my ye olde basse
which ole sk not so keene to part with it
oh sk
yer grammars all shot
you tried to go all populist and hippo
but yer grammar and yer spellin are suffring, olde human bean
how is this slangslingin hipster commensurate
with yer image
as the re-nay-sonce manne, you olde crim
how do we fuckin well reconcile this tanned olde beachcomber
droppin' his gees all over the plaice
with the pale consumptive
of yore
who always dotted his peas
and minded his queues
oh sk
yer mixin fuckin metaphores
you olde linguistic freake
you playful preposition dropper
you melder of the queens inglish into sk speak
and i see in my comments section
that yall adoptin sk speak
so kay
my tiny fishes
so kay
oh come let uss redraw him
its perfectly natural to use sk speak
espesh among the "straights"
you know the upptite cats
the ones with jobs workin for the manne
keepin your humble hero wrapped up in red tape
and waterbills
blaming me for the weather
holdin me accountable for mah wilde ways
for makin mariju fuckin wahna illegal
when it should be the boooze which is illegal, BAYBEE
if it has to either of em
theyre fuckin happy to send ya to war
but will nae let ya smoke mother nature
in case (STILL NO EVIDENCE BAYBEE)
in case
its bad for ya
well mr sk, we KNOW wars badde for ya
so kiss yer ass goodbye
HOWEVER
we aint sure (SURE!!)
that the ole potski is or aint
SO
we prohibiting it for yer own fuckin goode, boyo
but what about the receptors in mah brain
the one that will never switch on without ye olde THC
forget it sk
yer not allowed to smoke ye olde weedie
and paint yer songs
and choreograph yer poems
and sculpt yer abs
and penetrate the mysteries
of art
life
death
and
all
the
other
bullshit
you carry on with
so there you go
i am the monster you have created
i am sk
i am a blogger
i am a bohemian loyalist
and i have the earrings and drugs to prove it
i am a member of the choich
who have given up much rock
so you cood all bee free
dont try and holde me down
you eville govamence
i will not succumb
you will know me by the tail of the duds
i am sk
i have no capitals
i am unborn
yet manifest
i am....
uh oh
i gotta doo my xmas shopping
BAH HUMBUG BAYBEE!!!!
Monday, December 19, 2005
if the shoe fits....a sandlewood
ALRIGHT!
theres a bitto capitilised excitement
as a opening shot across your cyber bow
so wake yaselves uppe
ok
whats yer name?
whats yer number?
how do you fit in as a cog in this nasssty little mechanism?
are ya fightin' for the goode guise
or are ya on the side of vevil
are ya strikin' a blow for the empire of the bohemians
or a ya one of those nassssty "straights"
cos if ya answer yes to any of those questions
then consult ya family g fuckin p
and tell him that sk referred ya
talking of olde sk
(and who, really, isnt, darlingss?)
aint it time that the killah chose his goode
and badde awards for 2005?
and yes, come to think of it
which i do
i mean
good lord , sk, ya not gonna stoop to such a populist device
as a freakin' awards list?
nope, my friends
but just maybe a casual mention here and there
of those deserving of my humble admiration
and those whom have earned my bitterest scorn loathing diatribe harangue
and not just the ob-vee-us ones, baybee
but those behind the scenes heroes and heroines
who make this olde rockers existence more sublime
for example to mention 2
miss a p from melbourne
a choich fan for 22 years
thick black hair
i gotta touch it, i cant believe it aint a wiggy!
she pops up all over the wurld to see us rock our stuff
and a very nice human bein' as well
she gives me a cd
which is a track i did with mr gb
who is a musical ledge in my mind
1st time i hear track
very very tasty
nice one gb
i really do love yr werk
you are quite unique in aussie rock swamp
and the badde people, sk?
the ones who really got yer goat, you ascerbic olde cynick
the ones who chatted thru yer gigs like pigs?
the rude baggage handlers who hurt yer basse case?
the mechanoid drongoes in offices everywhere who never heard of ya band?
the people who dont buy yer records?
the parking inspectors who towed yer rolls royce
and clamped yer ferrari?
the guy at the post office who was busy with another customer
and made ya wait?
that guy on hotelwombat.com
who said he liked tha olde stuff much bettah?
that guy who trod on yer toes at the rydalmere family inn in 1981?
the guy who punched you in front of some girls at a bus stop in civic
in 19 fuckin'72?
are we getting close sk?
who deserves ole sks roth more than any of these blackguards?
well i gottan answer for ya, my little starrlings
yes indeed
and the worst ratbag of all has been....
YOU GUESSED IT !!!!
yes
it was me
theres a bitto capitilised excitement
as a opening shot across your cyber bow
so wake yaselves uppe
ok
whats yer name?
whats yer number?
how do you fit in as a cog in this nasssty little mechanism?
are ya fightin' for the goode guise
or are ya on the side of vevil
are ya strikin' a blow for the empire of the bohemians
or a ya one of those nassssty "straights"
cos if ya answer yes to any of those questions
then consult ya family g fuckin p
and tell him that sk referred ya
talking of olde sk
(and who, really, isnt, darlingss?)
aint it time that the killah chose his goode
and badde awards for 2005?
and yes, come to think of it
which i do
i mean
good lord , sk, ya not gonna stoop to such a populist device
as a freakin' awards list?
nope, my friends
but just maybe a casual mention here and there
of those deserving of my humble admiration
and those whom have earned my bitterest scorn loathing diatribe harangue
and not just the ob-vee-us ones, baybee
but those behind the scenes heroes and heroines
who make this olde rockers existence more sublime
for example to mention 2
miss a p from melbourne
a choich fan for 22 years
thick black hair
i gotta touch it, i cant believe it aint a wiggy!
she pops up all over the wurld to see us rock our stuff
and a very nice human bein' as well
she gives me a cd
which is a track i did with mr gb
who is a musical ledge in my mind
1st time i hear track
very very tasty
nice one gb
i really do love yr werk
you are quite unique in aussie rock swamp
and the badde people, sk?
the ones who really got yer goat, you ascerbic olde cynick
the ones who chatted thru yer gigs like pigs?
the rude baggage handlers who hurt yer basse case?
the mechanoid drongoes in offices everywhere who never heard of ya band?
the people who dont buy yer records?
the parking inspectors who towed yer rolls royce
and clamped yer ferrari?
the guy at the post office who was busy with another customer
and made ya wait?
that guy on hotelwombat.com
who said he liked tha olde stuff much bettah?
that guy who trod on yer toes at the rydalmere family inn in 1981?
the guy who punched you in front of some girls at a bus stop in civic
in 19 fuckin'72?
are we getting close sk?
who deserves ole sks roth more than any of these blackguards?
well i gottan answer for ya, my little starrlings
yes indeed
and the worst ratbag of all has been....
YOU GUESSED IT !!!!
yes
it was me
Sunday, December 18, 2005
bondi condidential
hell
whats thissss my fiendssss?
poh lice men all over bondi
checkin for weapons
marchin up and down the boardwalk
and theres a heavy metal band in the pavillion
and theres hardly anyone but locals on the beachie
and its a loverly day, my little angels
albeit a little windy
big daddy ignores the warnings
takes the swedish pair
and
the american pair for a swim
up the northern end
thankfully without any incidents
brothers sisters
peace love
why are we fighting?
its human nature, thats why
never thought itd hit me and david lanes own private beachy
house sitting for some friends
got me own little data machine
no nassssty b packers
so sk
we wanna see what ya got to say fer yer self now
now the tourie hass been n gone
now the noise has died down
and
the applause has faded in yer ringin' ears
now the whites have hit the white king
now yer basse in back in ye olde pawn shoppe (thats a little joke, kidsss)
now yer talent and charisma have been folded into their roadcases
and put on ice
ready for usa 2006
now that your callouses are softening
and yer throat is less husky
now what.....?
well, my people
thats a good question
and i thank that kind and perceptive fellow who asked it
was mah bloggy a tour only phenonomon?
now the fat lady has sung
now the partys over
is more bloggy finished too?
or does it have a life of its own
?????????????????????????????????
i dont wanna bore ya if ya dont wannit
give me that much credit
lets see
lets see
i aint to proud to beg
id go down on my (cyber)knees, but its no good to try
sitting up here in c and a-ms plaice
huh
they shouldda been chords
thats another wee joke , you hyaenas
so laugh it up a little
jesus
i am a little directionless today
off to a little dinner tonite in the bondi area
oh sk, god rest ye merrye olde gentleman
let nothing you dismay
as i said i dont believe in darwinism
i havent for a long time
and everyone said i was mad
they looked at me as if i had said the sky didnae exist
or that i thought the sun went round the erf
or whatever
(insert yer own incredulous comparison here)
and now at least theres a bit of a debate
yer allowed to at least say.....hang on a minute!
any way whatever yer beliefs
(and ya know what, it doesnt have to be the two ridiculous extremes offered to us now)
its worth thinking about
where the fuck did we come from?
does this feel like an accident to you?
can you believe all this stuff got here and keeps doin' its thing by chance?
any way
i gotta go off and get some christmas spirit
an then have it exorcised
and i gotta find some vegan sausages
and some non alcoholic whisky
and some organic speed
and....
(NARRATORS VOICE)
TUNE IN TOMORROW KIDS
TO FIND OUT ABOUT OLE SKS BIG "AND"
ah, thats all.....
whats thissss my fiendssss?
poh lice men all over bondi
checkin for weapons
marchin up and down the boardwalk
and theres a heavy metal band in the pavillion
and theres hardly anyone but locals on the beachie
and its a loverly day, my little angels
albeit a little windy
big daddy ignores the warnings
takes the swedish pair
and
the american pair for a swim
up the northern end
thankfully without any incidents
brothers sisters
peace love
why are we fighting?
its human nature, thats why
never thought itd hit me and david lanes own private beachy
house sitting for some friends
got me own little data machine
no nassssty b packers
so sk
we wanna see what ya got to say fer yer self now
now the tourie hass been n gone
now the noise has died down
and
the applause has faded in yer ringin' ears
now the whites have hit the white king
now yer basse in back in ye olde pawn shoppe (thats a little joke, kidsss)
now yer talent and charisma have been folded into their roadcases
and put on ice
ready for usa 2006
now that your callouses are softening
and yer throat is less husky
now what.....?
well, my people
thats a good question
and i thank that kind and perceptive fellow who asked it
was mah bloggy a tour only phenonomon?
now the fat lady has sung
now the partys over
is more bloggy finished too?
or does it have a life of its own
?????????????????????????????????
i dont wanna bore ya if ya dont wannit
give me that much credit
lets see
lets see
i aint to proud to beg
id go down on my (cyber)knees, but its no good to try
sitting up here in c and a-ms plaice
huh
they shouldda been chords
thats another wee joke , you hyaenas
so laugh it up a little
jesus
i am a little directionless today
off to a little dinner tonite in the bondi area
oh sk, god rest ye merrye olde gentleman
let nothing you dismay
as i said i dont believe in darwinism
i havent for a long time
and everyone said i was mad
they looked at me as if i had said the sky didnae exist
or that i thought the sun went round the erf
or whatever
(insert yer own incredulous comparison here)
and now at least theres a bit of a debate
yer allowed to at least say.....hang on a minute!
any way whatever yer beliefs
(and ya know what, it doesnt have to be the two ridiculous extremes offered to us now)
its worth thinking about
where the fuck did we come from?
does this feel like an accident to you?
can you believe all this stuff got here and keeps doin' its thing by chance?
any way
i gotta go off and get some christmas spirit
an then have it exorcised
and i gotta find some vegan sausages
and some non alcoholic whisky
and some organic speed
and....
(NARRATORS VOICE)
TUNE IN TOMORROW KIDS
TO FIND OUT ABOUT OLE SKS BIG "AND"
ah, thats all.....
Saturday, December 17, 2005
bitter comes out better on a stolen guitar
hi people
how are we today
not feeling too badde myself
a little blurry
a little sad its all over
a little burnt
a little fried
a little embroiled
spiegeltent was goode
the daylight put me off a little
hard to rock in daylight, didnt ya know?
hard to whip up some atmosphere
hard to make it happen
dont like nasssty daylight for rocknroll, brethren
need the night
need the dark
thats the way god made it
dont ask me why
nice warm rainy morning here
internet cafe almost empty
feel a bit lost for a while when tour ends
i guess im gonna lose a lotta customers here
now i cant give you up to the minuet details on the preceding nites fiasco
guess you gonna jump ship
take the pests with ya
ya know who i mean
those humourless ninnies
those "straights"
go on
off ya go
see ya later
dont darken mah blogstep again
bye
anyway
whats left
one final plane trip
one final beagle avoiding dash
sad to leave ole melbourne
whatta nice plaice
whatta pretty city
what lovely human beans
now i can concentrate on xmas
get fitted for my red suit
practice my chimney crawling
brush up on my reindeeer obedience classes
get my gnomes off ice
etc
etc
etc
back to bondi
back to the fambley
back to back
back to front
ok
well
you can imagine i do feel a little lost today
without mah groop
without a good rockin to look forward to
but i'll get by
live to rock another day
thats right
im saying goodbye for today
i love you all
except for (insert yer name here
if yer an unimaginative wally,
yeah you
thats right
YOU there)
but otherwise
tomorrow
I'LL BEE BACK!!!!
ess kay
how are we today
not feeling too badde myself
a little blurry
a little sad its all over
a little burnt
a little fried
a little embroiled
spiegeltent was goode
the daylight put me off a little
hard to rock in daylight, didnt ya know?
hard to whip up some atmosphere
hard to make it happen
dont like nasssty daylight for rocknroll, brethren
need the night
need the dark
thats the way god made it
dont ask me why
nice warm rainy morning here
internet cafe almost empty
feel a bit lost for a while when tour ends
i guess im gonna lose a lotta customers here
now i cant give you up to the minuet details on the preceding nites fiasco
guess you gonna jump ship
take the pests with ya
ya know who i mean
those humourless ninnies
those "straights"
go on
off ya go
see ya later
dont darken mah blogstep again
bye
anyway
whats left
one final plane trip
one final beagle avoiding dash
sad to leave ole melbourne
whatta nice plaice
whatta pretty city
what lovely human beans
now i can concentrate on xmas
get fitted for my red suit
practice my chimney crawling
brush up on my reindeeer obedience classes
get my gnomes off ice
etc
etc
etc
back to bondi
back to the fambley
back to back
back to front
ok
well
you can imagine i do feel a little lost today
without mah groop
without a good rockin to look forward to
but i'll get by
live to rock another day
thats right
im saying goodbye for today
i love you all
except for (insert yer name here
if yer an unimaginative wally,
yeah you
thats right
YOU there)
but otherwise
tomorrow
I'LL BEE BACK!!!!
ess kay
Friday, December 16, 2005
in the early morning rain.....
hello readers
a somewhat bleary and slightly sobered sk
here in acland st
st kilda
early morning
hangovered
a little down
a little sad
can i bee vulnerable for ya?
ole sk not feeling too cheerful, this morning
howcome you olde rocker? whats yer complaint today?
i dunno.
sometimes it takes its toll
everything adds up
left mah suitcase at the gig
no clothes
no toothbrush
no nothing
just last nites stuff all damp n sweaty
ears ringin
eyes blurrin
head aching
throat sore and tired
inspiration....i have none
bad news business wise
always a catch
always a loophole
always somethin upsetting the applecart
ah what about the gig sk...didja rock?
yeah bub, we rocked
what about the talkers sk?
fuck em. the rude sods
how was the poetry reading?
ok except i got there and i couldnt read the fine print
i had to have a glasses audition
i tried on various glasses of the audiences
until i could see mah own wordies on the page
but when i was finished i could nae see straight or crooked
ah drinkin mah soy hot chokky
feelin a little better
oh sk, you knew you were riding too high
you knew you had to crash rainy friday morning in melbourne
youre all alone
so lonely and sad
ahhhh nevermind, olde bouy
just keep blogging till ya feel a little better
but
but
but
i gotta do a photo session for the AGE
no clothes
no shampoo to wask mah greasy wispy hair
no razor to shave my beardy into shape
no charisma left
not even any pot
nada
nicht
ingenting
cmon cheer up you maudlin fool
spiegeltent tonite
yeah and thats the end of mah tour
that makes me sad too
oh well
thats life at the top of the charts
in the fast lane
in the light of reflection
in the spotty light
in the early morning rain
just another washed up olde rocker
typing at his blogg
just another superstah
goin thru harde thymes
another fly on the windshield
another time
another plaice
people im sadde
im badde
but im gladde
that your there
glad i have ya to talk to
gladde that ya understand mah moods
mah everchangin moods
no one ever said it would be easy, sk...
thats for sure
olde son
thats for fuckin sure
a somewhat bleary and slightly sobered sk
here in acland st
st kilda
early morning
hangovered
a little down
a little sad
can i bee vulnerable for ya?
ole sk not feeling too cheerful, this morning
howcome you olde rocker? whats yer complaint today?
i dunno.
sometimes it takes its toll
everything adds up
left mah suitcase at the gig
no clothes
no toothbrush
no nothing
just last nites stuff all damp n sweaty
ears ringin
eyes blurrin
head aching
throat sore and tired
inspiration....i have none
bad news business wise
always a catch
always a loophole
always somethin upsetting the applecart
ah what about the gig sk...didja rock?
yeah bub, we rocked
what about the talkers sk?
fuck em. the rude sods
how was the poetry reading?
ok except i got there and i couldnt read the fine print
i had to have a glasses audition
i tried on various glasses of the audiences
until i could see mah own wordies on the page
but when i was finished i could nae see straight or crooked
ah drinkin mah soy hot chokky
feelin a little better
oh sk, you knew you were riding too high
you knew you had to crash rainy friday morning in melbourne
youre all alone
so lonely and sad
ahhhh nevermind, olde bouy
just keep blogging till ya feel a little better
but
but
but
i gotta do a photo session for the AGE
no clothes
no shampoo to wask mah greasy wispy hair
no razor to shave my beardy into shape
no charisma left
not even any pot
nada
nicht
ingenting
cmon cheer up you maudlin fool
spiegeltent tonite
yeah and thats the end of mah tour
that makes me sad too
oh well
thats life at the top of the charts
in the fast lane
in the light of reflection
in the spotty light
in the early morning rain
just another washed up olde rocker
typing at his blogg
just another superstah
goin thru harde thymes
another fly on the windshield
another time
another plaice
people im sadde
im badde
but im gladde
that your there
glad i have ya to talk to
gladde that ya understand mah moods
mah everchangin moods
no one ever said it would be easy, sk...
thats for sure
olde son
thats for fuckin sure
Thursday, December 15, 2005
throwin shadows on our eyes
hi ya mah peeps
hi ya ya awful blog addled fooles
its gonna bee quick
its gonna be hard
its gonna bee fast
we did real well in addledlaid
yeah we slew em
laid em in the aisles
what would ya expect from the best band still extant on this plane?
yeah we were pretty good
maybe....
maybe
just maybe ole sk had one two many glasses o bubbly
oh sk you olde devil
you wilde man of rock
so thats it
i came
i saw
i conked out
what more is there
an amazing gig
the earth moves
people keep sinning
the world keeps spinning
all the rest is just bullshit
oh sk
you little fucking trooper
treadin the boards till late
then up at the crack of dawn
feeling rosie all over
writing yer blog for those fiends that ya know
are hanging out in cyberspace
jonesing for jesus juice
the ones who need their fixx of sk
FUCKIN DAILY!!
ok i know nothing gonna take away them symptoms
but the real thing
here it is my kilblings
no placebos
this be straight from the hoarses mouth
this be the pure gospel
the goode oil,
mah crew
olde sk up so early
to bring you this
ok i guess you got that
now .........
airports
nasssty sniffy fuckin beagle fuckin hounds
nasssty air turbulence
nasssty middle seats next to some "straight"
who cant dig sks bohemian fuckin ways
then a nasssssty boring interview in melb
then soundcheck
then poetry reeding
then gig
then sks total noivous brakedown
between these momentous events
sk must
contact melbournian bohemian buddies
(read lazy good for nothin drug fiends and layabouts)
must have his vegan nibblies
must do his yoga
must do his rebirthing
must do his pilates, pontious
must do his stretching
must do his cardio vascular whatsis with added thingos
must do my nlp
must do my gentle 20 mile jog
must have a shower
(phew, sk, at last....!)
must trim mah little beardy
must have mah botox shots
must have mah lippo suktion
must have mah charisma irrigation
and all the other ways and means
i sustain this illusion of being perpetually 18
whilst actually aged
123
but no matter
i guess thats it
thatll be about it
for this self obsessed ole s o b
for this load of olde twaddle
ok
bye
will fill ya in
on all the thrills and spills
in melby
mah fave aussie city
in the hole of victoria
i love you fools
sk
hi ya ya awful blog addled fooles
its gonna bee quick
its gonna be hard
its gonna bee fast
we did real well in addledlaid
yeah we slew em
laid em in the aisles
what would ya expect from the best band still extant on this plane?
yeah we were pretty good
maybe....
maybe
just maybe ole sk had one two many glasses o bubbly
oh sk you olde devil
you wilde man of rock
so thats it
i came
i saw
i conked out
what more is there
an amazing gig
the earth moves
people keep sinning
the world keeps spinning
all the rest is just bullshit
oh sk
you little fucking trooper
treadin the boards till late
then up at the crack of dawn
feeling rosie all over
writing yer blog for those fiends that ya know
are hanging out in cyberspace
jonesing for jesus juice
the ones who need their fixx of sk
FUCKIN DAILY!!
ok i know nothing gonna take away them symptoms
but the real thing
here it is my kilblings
no placebos
this be straight from the hoarses mouth
this be the pure gospel
the goode oil,
mah crew
olde sk up so early
to bring you this
ok i guess you got that
now .........
airports
nasssty sniffy fuckin beagle fuckin hounds
nasssty air turbulence
nasssty middle seats next to some "straight"
who cant dig sks bohemian fuckin ways
then a nasssssty boring interview in melb
then soundcheck
then poetry reeding
then gig
then sks total noivous brakedown
between these momentous events
sk must
contact melbournian bohemian buddies
(read lazy good for nothin drug fiends and layabouts)
must have his vegan nibblies
must do his yoga
must do his rebirthing
must do his pilates, pontious
must do his stretching
must do his cardio vascular whatsis with added thingos
must do my nlp
must do my gentle 20 mile jog
must have a shower
(phew, sk, at last....!)
must trim mah little beardy
must have mah botox shots
must have mah lippo suktion
must have mah charisma irrigation
and all the other ways and means
i sustain this illusion of being perpetually 18
whilst actually aged
123
but no matter
i guess thats it
thatll be about it
for this self obsessed ole s o b
for this load of olde twaddle
ok
bye
will fill ya in
on all the thrills and spills
in melby
mah fave aussie city
in the hole of victoria
i love you fools
sk
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
oh adelaide !
made it my people
made it to adelaide
pass the nasssssty sniffy dogs
trying to sniff mah stash
trying to bust mah ass
trying to bring me down low
lock me up
so i cant spread mah peace and light
hasslin me
who am the only one
but im a here now
my little frolickers
my rude little pests
my adored creatures
my little fishes
oh yeah
they cannae keep this ole bouy outta s.a.
hows it gonna be tonite sk?
fuckin amazing
are you gonna be goode?
of fuckin course
how goode are ya gonna be you olde geeenius ?
the fuckin best!
as always!
ok runnin slightly behind time
so mustnt be on here too long
gotta soundcheck
gotta get mah vegan food
gotta get mah yoga in
(big fat lady next to me on a porno pickup site!!!verrrry distracting)
gotta meditate
gotta solve the problems of the world
gotta transcend
gotta walk thru walls
gotta tie it all together for ya
the whole kit and kaboodle in one easy song
gotta nail down the whole freakin universe for ya in one poem
gotta paint yer life in one tiny picture
gotta sing ya to sleep then back again
what is this horse im riding here
whoah! its outta control
cant stop writing, painting, composing, singing, laughing
sk....what the fuck are you on , man
are you on some weird new mood enhancer?
are you back on le badde stuff?
or is just some powerful new strain of the white widow
that ya have got yer greedy little mitts on?
no my hearts
ole sk is stone cole sober
nada
nicht
ingenting
nothing, my loves
sk is high on life
sk is vibrating with prana
sk is spitting chi
sk is swimming in a sea of energy
(jesus, the lady is looking at pix of guys with their weddding tackle out)
(jesus, her pen name is the naughty nurse!!!)
ok
must stay focussed
oh adelaide !
you gonna wrock tonite, sister
you frumpy olde dump
you little city in the middle o' nowhere
the choich bouys are back
and this time its personal
too much energy
im feeling too good
up and down
thats olde sk
the best and the worst
you have never met a more saintly man
or a more rotten evil swine
a genius
an idiot
an intellectual
a yobbo
an aussie
an englishman
you name em
(insert your own contradiction here)
but i tell ya one thing my olde fruits
i love this blogging thang
its having mah own say
its my rejoinder
its my riposte
its my forum
its my own fault
so it be 2 33 now
must be back at hotel at 3
25 minutes to type
to walk
to navigate these mean adeladian streets
to get ready to rock
and dont forget roll
cos rock without roll
is yer jet
is yer acca dacca
is yer van halen
is yer fritz ferdinande
is yer sabbaff
is yer purple
no mah friends
rocknroll is like yingnyang
no goode rockin
if ya cant roll
that just is the way god planned it
i cant help it
baby
baby
baby
i was born to boogie
hey kids
summertime blues
jump upndown in mah blue suede shoes
hey kids boogie too
didja?
is it love
is it love
is it love
that makes us rock?
sk says yes
sk says choose life
sk says no war
sk says send a thousand bucks to the sk home for olde wrockers
sk says excuse me, can you pass the salt
thats it you addicted blogg fiends
its terminus interruptus im afraid
im pullin the plug
im takin this bloggy off the life support
im annexing yer soul
im appropriating yer heart
but remember
i love ya
and id do anything
anything at all
if it would make ya happy
just for one moment
ok
done
over
and
out
!
made it to adelaide
pass the nasssssty sniffy dogs
trying to sniff mah stash
trying to bust mah ass
trying to bring me down low
lock me up
so i cant spread mah peace and light
hasslin me
who am the only one
but im a here now
my little frolickers
my rude little pests
my adored creatures
my little fishes
oh yeah
they cannae keep this ole bouy outta s.a.
hows it gonna be tonite sk?
fuckin amazing
are you gonna be goode?
of fuckin course
how goode are ya gonna be you olde geeenius ?
the fuckin best!
as always!
ok runnin slightly behind time
so mustnt be on here too long
gotta soundcheck
gotta get mah vegan food
gotta get mah yoga in
(big fat lady next to me on a porno pickup site!!!verrrry distracting)
gotta meditate
gotta solve the problems of the world
gotta transcend
gotta walk thru walls
gotta tie it all together for ya
the whole kit and kaboodle in one easy song
gotta nail down the whole freakin universe for ya in one poem
gotta paint yer life in one tiny picture
gotta sing ya to sleep then back again
what is this horse im riding here
whoah! its outta control
cant stop writing, painting, composing, singing, laughing
sk....what the fuck are you on , man
are you on some weird new mood enhancer?
are you back on le badde stuff?
or is just some powerful new strain of the white widow
that ya have got yer greedy little mitts on?
no my hearts
ole sk is stone cole sober
nada
nicht
ingenting
nothing, my loves
sk is high on life
sk is vibrating with prana
sk is spitting chi
sk is swimming in a sea of energy
(jesus, the lady is looking at pix of guys with their weddding tackle out)
(jesus, her pen name is the naughty nurse!!!)
ok
must stay focussed
oh adelaide !
you gonna wrock tonite, sister
you frumpy olde dump
you little city in the middle o' nowhere
the choich bouys are back
and this time its personal
too much energy
im feeling too good
up and down
thats olde sk
the best and the worst
you have never met a more saintly man
or a more rotten evil swine
a genius
an idiot
an intellectual
a yobbo
an aussie
an englishman
you name em
(insert your own contradiction here)
but i tell ya one thing my olde fruits
i love this blogging thang
its having mah own say
its my rejoinder
its my riposte
its my forum
its my own fault
so it be 2 33 now
must be back at hotel at 3
25 minutes to type
to walk
to navigate these mean adeladian streets
to get ready to rock
and dont forget roll
cos rock without roll
is yer jet
is yer acca dacca
is yer van halen
is yer fritz ferdinande
is yer sabbaff
is yer purple
no mah friends
rocknroll is like yingnyang
no goode rockin
if ya cant roll
that just is the way god planned it
i cant help it
baby
baby
baby
i was born to boogie
hey kids
summertime blues
jump upndown in mah blue suede shoes
hey kids boogie too
didja?
is it love
is it love
is it love
that makes us rock?
sk says yes
sk says choose life
sk says no war
sk says send a thousand bucks to the sk home for olde wrockers
sk says excuse me, can you pass the salt
thats it you addicted blogg fiends
its terminus interruptus im afraid
im pullin the plug
im takin this bloggy off the life support
im annexing yer soul
im appropriating yer heart
but remember
i love ya
and id do anything
anything at all
if it would make ya happy
just for one moment
ok
done
over
and
out
!
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
be like you could, all my friends say
ok
im ashamed
im embarrassed
my bloggy yesterday
sorry
should not rant and rave
should not spend time releasing negative energy
should not bore you with my pustulent diatribes
so no more
that nasty part of sk has been quarantined
(tent on quarantino)
the troublemaker has been isolated
the ringleader has been apprehended and dealt with
severely
thats that
and thats it
and that
and that
no
nevermind
new paragraph
elektra and miranda have arrived
oh my lovely swedish daughters
so kind and nice
ole sk basking in the total overkill of feminine vibes
my five daughters waiting on me
hand and foot
oh so nice people
i recommend having five daughters
oh filial love
oh big daddy sk
(son, did you mo-lest mah daughter
he said, sk, i do not know of what you speak)
yes yes yes
what else
i can write a bloggy filled with love and light
i do not need to stoop to pointless carping criticism
of pea brained rockers
of gurlie schmaltz
of....
(ok he's loose again
the demon sk
the bitter olde fellah
hang on
sound of left lobe being totally flattened)
ah, thats better
i mean he comes up with something interesting
every now and then
but he was the guy who was rude to the poor little bangles
he was the guy who wouldnt shake simon le blobs hand
he was the guy that played that nasssty trick on toto
whilst make starfish
he was the guy who disagreed with clive davis at arista
he was the guy who insulted the bullies at lyneham high
and left me to be beaten up
(hiya nick ward)
he was the guy....ah fuck him , people
if ya ever meet olde sk
and that wanker is in charge of the operation
give im a quick knee in the balls
and ask 'im about maybe these fucken bouys
or whatever
whatever you like
i dont care
its a sunny morning in bondi
all five daughters present and accounted for
adelaide and melbourne looomin large
and a poetry reading in melbo as well
oh sk
you pretentious olde wanker
a fucking poetry reading
jesus
i cannot call myself a poet
it is a term that should be conferred
like genius
or a knighthood
(fat chance of that, olde bean)
so i dunno
if you meet someone who tells ya theyre a poet
laugh and walk away
(sounds of 250 people leaving sks bloggy)
hey mah peeeeple
where ya goin
but you do meet wankers
ya say what do ya do man
and they say
Im a poet, dude
HA
HA
nevermind my little fishes
still
it is alright
come to the po nite
the the cornah hotel
then the church murch desk
you can have a total sk nite
readin the po
listnin to the mooosic
lookin at the prints
then finish the nite
by being safe with the new sk condoms
available in titanium white
brilliant red
and regular sorta greeny yellow (these with ribs)
so
the merch train keeps on a rolling
with the new range of sk products
belching out of third world sweatshops soon
guaranteed to be made from endangered species!!
whatever you fiends
i should go home
before he gets nasssty again
lookin forward to narnia
BUT THE FUCKIN WITCH SHOULD HAVE BLACK HAIR NOT BLONDE!!!!!
nevermind all that
elektra is hassling me to finish up
havin a fershlugginer argument rite here
in this backpacker ridden, jet loving internet cafe
jesus
didnt see this coming
she cant understand that theres a few hundred peeeeple
who rely on this bloggo
for their daily fixx
ok
im gonna have to pull the pluggy now
im sorry, my little rodents
my little conkubines
my little ones
mu children of the night
BUT THATS IT
i love ya
YE OLDE SK
im ashamed
im embarrassed
my bloggy yesterday
sorry
should not rant and rave
should not spend time releasing negative energy
should not bore you with my pustulent diatribes
so no more
that nasty part of sk has been quarantined
(tent on quarantino)
the troublemaker has been isolated
the ringleader has been apprehended and dealt with
severely
thats that
and thats it
and that
and that
no
nevermind
new paragraph
elektra and miranda have arrived
oh my lovely swedish daughters
so kind and nice
ole sk basking in the total overkill of feminine vibes
my five daughters waiting on me
hand and foot
oh so nice people
i recommend having five daughters
oh filial love
oh big daddy sk
(son, did you mo-lest mah daughter
he said, sk, i do not know of what you speak)
yes yes yes
what else
i can write a bloggy filled with love and light
i do not need to stoop to pointless carping criticism
of pea brained rockers
of gurlie schmaltz
of....
(ok he's loose again
the demon sk
the bitter olde fellah
hang on
sound of left lobe being totally flattened)
ah, thats better
i mean he comes up with something interesting
every now and then
but he was the guy who was rude to the poor little bangles
he was the guy who wouldnt shake simon le blobs hand
he was the guy that played that nasssty trick on toto
whilst make starfish
he was the guy who disagreed with clive davis at arista
he was the guy who insulted the bullies at lyneham high
and left me to be beaten up
(hiya nick ward)
he was the guy....ah fuck him , people
if ya ever meet olde sk
and that wanker is in charge of the operation
give im a quick knee in the balls
and ask 'im about maybe these fucken bouys
or whatever
whatever you like
i dont care
its a sunny morning in bondi
all five daughters present and accounted for
adelaide and melbourne looomin large
and a poetry reading in melbo as well
oh sk
you pretentious olde wanker
a fucking poetry reading
jesus
i cannot call myself a poet
it is a term that should be conferred
like genius
or a knighthood
(fat chance of that, olde bean)
so i dunno
if you meet someone who tells ya theyre a poet
laugh and walk away
(sounds of 250 people leaving sks bloggy)
hey mah peeeeple
where ya goin
but you do meet wankers
ya say what do ya do man
and they say
Im a poet, dude
HA
HA
nevermind my little fishes
still
it is alright
come to the po nite
the the cornah hotel
then the church murch desk
you can have a total sk nite
readin the po
listnin to the mooosic
lookin at the prints
then finish the nite
by being safe with the new sk condoms
available in titanium white
brilliant red
and regular sorta greeny yellow (these with ribs)
so
the merch train keeps on a rolling
with the new range of sk products
belching out of third world sweatshops soon
guaranteed to be made from endangered species!!
whatever you fiends
i should go home
before he gets nasssty again
lookin forward to narnia
BUT THE FUCKIN WITCH SHOULD HAVE BLACK HAIR NOT BLONDE!!!!!
nevermind all that
elektra is hassling me to finish up
havin a fershlugginer argument rite here
in this backpacker ridden, jet loving internet cafe
jesus
didnt see this coming
she cant understand that theres a few hundred peeeeple
who rely on this bloggo
for their daily fixx
ok
im gonna have to pull the pluggy now
im sorry, my little rodents
my little conkubines
my little ones
mu children of the night
BUT THATS IT
i love ya
YE OLDE SK
Monday, December 12, 2005
careful with that blog, esskay
yeah
right
ok
here we are
sk had a goode knight last knight
rocked
rolled
shimmied
strolled
put my left foot in
put my left foot out
plucked the basse
sang like a lark in the warm fragrant dark
etc
etc
etc
youre not gonna believe this, my pets
but the jet are playing in this internet cafe
fucking up my bloggy
as i try to ignore their hamfisted sub acdc
bgrade beatle tripe with jam sauce
cmon lord
give us back george harrison and jeff buckley
and we'll give ya the jet
gladly
(can ya imagine the meeting where they chose the name
uh um duh i gotta grate name fellahs
yeah...duh whats that?
well uh duh wait for it..its pretty speshal...JET
oh wow yeah thats great
sound of shakespeare and rimbaud rolling in their graves)
anyway
(fuck, its hard to ignore the sheer awfulness but im trying)
anyway
jesus
i dont know if i can carry on
anyway
the newt town
still basking in afterglow
still glowing in afterbask
how was it , for you?
im sorry i cannae sit here and listen to this any longer
blame the jet
blame the fuckin jet
im outta here
sk
right
ok
here we are
sk had a goode knight last knight
rocked
rolled
shimmied
strolled
put my left foot in
put my left foot out
plucked the basse
sang like a lark in the warm fragrant dark
etc
etc
etc
youre not gonna believe this, my pets
but the jet are playing in this internet cafe
fucking up my bloggy
as i try to ignore their hamfisted sub acdc
bgrade beatle tripe with jam sauce
cmon lord
give us back george harrison and jeff buckley
and we'll give ya the jet
gladly
(can ya imagine the meeting where they chose the name
uh um duh i gotta grate name fellahs
yeah...duh whats that?
well uh duh wait for it..its pretty speshal...JET
oh wow yeah thats great
sound of shakespeare and rimbaud rolling in their graves)
anyway
(fuck, its hard to ignore the sheer awfulness but im trying)
anyway
jesus
i dont know if i can carry on
anyway
the newt town
still basking in afterglow
still glowing in afterbask
how was it , for you?
im sorry i cannae sit here and listen to this any longer
blame the jet
blame the fuckin jet
im outta here
sk
Sunday, December 11, 2005
the tomb of the unknown blog
yo peeeeeeple
alright
sunday morning in bondi
the internet cafe nearly empty cept for me
and some bleary eyed german backpacker
just had me brekky
sausage dog woke up scarlet
krallman had a machiato
nk bought 2 coffees to take home
eve and aurora had pancakes
ah the ordinary and the extraordinary
very few of the people at the cafe realise
that the dude in the black hat and white beardy
is a rocknroll superstah
about to tread the boards in only a few more hours
uh oh ahhh missy higgy on the radio
weakness in muscles
dark fog in mah brain
ah make it stop
ah make it go away
maudlin girlie mushiness invading ole sks neurons
ahhh no...cant take much more
syrupy schmaltzy tripe ascending mah cortex
must focus on bloggy....
must blot out this assault on my sensibilities
ah no sinking in fourth form gurlie poetry
NO
NO
NO!!!!!!
i will not succumb....
thank god
its over
collectin' mah thoughts
can i be right and the whole world wrong?????
anyway
tonite
cautious, my felons
my fine feathered finks
my choichy little chickens
my anons
my avid and ardent amours
phew
poor sk
so sensitive to horrible sounds
so delicate mah poor ears
so much terrible noise around
IS THERE ANYTHING YOU LIKE YOU GRUMPY OLDE BASTARD?
IS THERE ANY FUCKIN MUSIC YOU LISTEN TO.......?
oh sk, isnt it lonely up here
here in yer tower where you guard the true rock heritage
here in yer brain where you still struggle to inject meaning
into a meaningless pop rock hodge podge
will they ever reward you sk?
will there be a shady grove at the end of your long trail?
will you ever be inducted into the heaven of olde rockers
put out to pasture
enjoying yer twilight years in the sun?
or is it just an endless struggle against the forces of syrup
against the horrible eighties dross of franz fuckin ferdinand
against the jet
against the backstreet bouys
against all those ten million girlie singers
against the hordes of rappers
against the grain
against the flow
against the wind
(SEE THEM CHOICHBOUYS RIDIN' AGAINST THE WIND)
you see, the day i was born
an angel said to my muvver, (JOYCIE)
(WHO CANT COME ON THIS SITE COS SHE CANNAE ABIDE THE FOOKIN LANGWIDGE)
the angel said
this wee chile you hold in yer arms will one day be the saviour of
rocknroll
he will soldier on with his velvety voice
with his white beardy
with his freckles and earrings
armed only with ye olde basse
armed only with three f maj 7 chords
and the TRUTH!!!!!!
and lo, he will play the newt town twice
AND IT WILL BE GOODE
FOR THOSE WHO HAVE EARS TO HEAR
TO THOSE WHO HAVE BANK CARDS TO BUY CHURCH MURCH
TO THOSE WHO HAVE BACKSTAGE PASSES AND COCAINE
yes, go forth proudly
for this weee chile will teach us how to ROCK!
but he will rock without forsaking intelligence
he will rock without forsaking meaning
and literary devices
(DIDJA KNOW THERE WERE 7 TYPES OF AMBIGUITY....?
AND THE CHOICH KNOWS MOST OF EM)
and the angel sprinkled moondust in mah hair
and golden sunlight in mah eyes of grey
any way, i digress
i digress, my little whoppers w/cheese
i digress my soy lattes with raw sugar
i digress my wheat toasts with apricot conserves
uh oh im digressing helplessly here
and im spoilin' ya with mah huge daily blog
you guys....!
you guys are gonna have to learn to get by with less
i cant give ya this much everyday
i gotta go home and play barbies with the kiddiwinks
i gotta go home and chop down a christmas tree
i gotta go home and scrub my basse guitar
and learn my fuckin scales
i gotta go home and warm up ye olde velvety deep voice
so tonite
so tonite
i can hardly type it without getting all misty...
so tonite that ye may rocke
so tonite ye may rolle
so tonite ye may twitch and stomp
and have a rockingly goode time
youll see me there tonite
i have propitiated Indra, no storms tonite
i have spoken to Vishnu
who is sks main man
and he said to me
(in sanskrit, which i mysteriously understood)
he said
oh sk
oh you noble and still handsome olde rocker
go to the newt town
and let your people know
it is ok to rock again
only by rockin shall ye be healed
and forget
the bills
the jobs
the politician wurms
the fuckin neighbours and their yappy lil sausage dog
the deadlines
the morons crowding ya in
the nay sayers
the big brothers
the schmaltzy syrupy fuckin tripe thats breakin ya down
the retro oafish swaggering pea brains
the poofy scotch rubbish
the country and weston drivel
the bouy bands and the gurl bands
the aor adult contemporary bullshit
and all the rest
yes sk
tonite
TONITE YOU WILL ROCK
(!)
thats all folks
alright
sunday morning in bondi
the internet cafe nearly empty cept for me
and some bleary eyed german backpacker
just had me brekky
sausage dog woke up scarlet
krallman had a machiato
nk bought 2 coffees to take home
eve and aurora had pancakes
ah the ordinary and the extraordinary
very few of the people at the cafe realise
that the dude in the black hat and white beardy
is a rocknroll superstah
about to tread the boards in only a few more hours
uh oh ahhh missy higgy on the radio
weakness in muscles
dark fog in mah brain
ah make it stop
ah make it go away
maudlin girlie mushiness invading ole sks neurons
ahhh no...cant take much more
syrupy schmaltzy tripe ascending mah cortex
must focus on bloggy....
must blot out this assault on my sensibilities
ah no sinking in fourth form gurlie poetry
NO
NO
NO!!!!!!
i will not succumb....
thank god
its over
collectin' mah thoughts
can i be right and the whole world wrong?????
anyway
tonite
cautious, my felons
my fine feathered finks
my choichy little chickens
my anons
my avid and ardent amours
phew
poor sk
so sensitive to horrible sounds
so delicate mah poor ears
so much terrible noise around
IS THERE ANYTHING YOU LIKE YOU GRUMPY OLDE BASTARD?
IS THERE ANY FUCKIN MUSIC YOU LISTEN TO.......?
oh sk, isnt it lonely up here
here in yer tower where you guard the true rock heritage
here in yer brain where you still struggle to inject meaning
into a meaningless pop rock hodge podge
will they ever reward you sk?
will there be a shady grove at the end of your long trail?
will you ever be inducted into the heaven of olde rockers
put out to pasture
enjoying yer twilight years in the sun?
or is it just an endless struggle against the forces of syrup
against the horrible eighties dross of franz fuckin ferdinand
against the jet
against the backstreet bouys
against all those ten million girlie singers
against the hordes of rappers
against the grain
against the flow
against the wind
(SEE THEM CHOICHBOUYS RIDIN' AGAINST THE WIND)
you see, the day i was born
an angel said to my muvver, (JOYCIE)
(WHO CANT COME ON THIS SITE COS SHE CANNAE ABIDE THE FOOKIN LANGWIDGE)
the angel said
this wee chile you hold in yer arms will one day be the saviour of
rocknroll
he will soldier on with his velvety voice
with his white beardy
with his freckles and earrings
armed only with ye olde basse
armed only with three f maj 7 chords
and the TRUTH!!!!!!
and lo, he will play the newt town twice
AND IT WILL BE GOODE
FOR THOSE WHO HAVE EARS TO HEAR
TO THOSE WHO HAVE BANK CARDS TO BUY CHURCH MURCH
TO THOSE WHO HAVE BACKSTAGE PASSES AND COCAINE
yes, go forth proudly
for this weee chile will teach us how to ROCK!
but he will rock without forsaking intelligence
he will rock without forsaking meaning
and literary devices
(DIDJA KNOW THERE WERE 7 TYPES OF AMBIGUITY....?
AND THE CHOICH KNOWS MOST OF EM)
and the angel sprinkled moondust in mah hair
and golden sunlight in mah eyes of grey
any way, i digress
i digress, my little whoppers w/cheese
i digress my soy lattes with raw sugar
i digress my wheat toasts with apricot conserves
uh oh im digressing helplessly here
and im spoilin' ya with mah huge daily blog
you guys....!
you guys are gonna have to learn to get by with less
i cant give ya this much everyday
i gotta go home and play barbies with the kiddiwinks
i gotta go home and chop down a christmas tree
i gotta go home and scrub my basse guitar
and learn my fuckin scales
i gotta go home and warm up ye olde velvety deep voice
so tonite
so tonite
i can hardly type it without getting all misty...
so tonite that ye may rocke
so tonite ye may rolle
so tonite ye may twitch and stomp
and have a rockingly goode time
youll see me there tonite
i have propitiated Indra, no storms tonite
i have spoken to Vishnu
who is sks main man
and he said to me
(in sanskrit, which i mysteriously understood)
he said
oh sk
oh you noble and still handsome olde rocker
go to the newt town
and let your people know
it is ok to rock again
only by rockin shall ye be healed
and forget
the bills
the jobs
the politician wurms
the fuckin neighbours and their yappy lil sausage dog
the deadlines
the morons crowding ya in
the nay sayers
the big brothers
the schmaltzy syrupy fuckin tripe thats breakin ya down
the retro oafish swaggering pea brains
the poofy scotch rubbish
the country and weston drivel
the bouy bands and the gurl bands
the aor adult contemporary bullshit
and all the rest
yes sk
tonite
TONITE YOU WILL ROCK
(!)
thats all folks
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